GOD, OUR LOVING CRE ATOR

We have long believed in God, our loving creator. We have mused on the meaning for us in this present world and imagined what it may mean for our life beyond this world in Heaven. But how many if anybody has actually pushed this conviction to its logical dimension? This is of course impossible as we say we believe in an infinite God and we know that we are only finite beings in every way except that we will live eternally and are given some degree of creativity and love whose limits we do not know. So here in this essay we want to push out our understanding of what it may mean to have a God that is both infinitely loving and infinitely creative. It is an act of worship to reflect on this subject. It will be finite, limited to what we can perceive by the Spirit of God living within the creativity that God has imparted to us.

Basically I find it hard to believe that this God would have made only one earth with people on it. What was He doing before He dreamed up this intricate world? Its creation was a 7 day job according to Scripture, although its preparation may have been untold millennium longer. From our perspective, Earth is the only planet likely to have beings on near to our kind as we require a medium temperature for existence. But there may be many solar systems beyond this one which may as well have beings near our kind on at least one “earth” or perhaps many earths. There may also be many kinds of beings not limited to our temperature span, so that any planet may have different structures of beings. After all, God is not of our physical kind but of Spirit, who is not limited to our limitations of time and space and physical matter. We accept angels to be of another dimension. As logically, there may be any number of planets or stars inhabiting created being between what we call physical and Spiritual. There may be other dimensions of beings with whom a loving God can communicate.

It is God’s nature to love his creation just as we love our creations. Children are our creation, formed by the gift of creativity God has implanted in his creation of us. We would give our lives for our children just as God would and did in Christ. But being finite, we can love only so many children intensely. God can love any number of people in his infinite love. I suppose if we could love many more children and provide for them we might have wanted many more. God has no such limitation. He can have a billion as easily as a few. And care about all of them and keep tract of them. How finite we are relative to Him! It only makes sense that he would want what we would call an infinite number of children for his infinite love to be spread throughout his universe. It makes little sense that we would claim that we are his total concern here on planet earth which resolves around only a medium sized star. While we perceive what we believe is his infinite love for us, how obvious it is that he has “other sheep not of this fold”!

Some years ago I was on our orange farm on a Sunday morning watching over our half-reaped fruit. It was a time of worship out there in nature, reflecting on the kindness of God in giving us this ten acre farm of oranges. At one time that morning I was walking across the farm, through the grass observing trees still to be picked as well as other kinds of fruit trees I had planted. Suddenly I was filled with exuberance and gushed out, “God, are you enjoying this as much as I am?! I went home and drew a map of every tree and entitled it, “The Garden of God”. Here he gave us this farm to enjoy as we can in our limited way. But he had million of acres of farms, valleys, mountains, woods, lakes, rivers, and oceans even here on this little planet. Certainly he made it for us to enjoy, but nobody has even seen more than a minute fraction of all he has made. I was so impressed once about the beauty of wild flowers that I began to video them enlarged to see their intricate beauty.

For whom was this beauty created? Certainly not for humans only. For his own joy he made them as well as to share the beauty with us. We could as well focus on any aspect of his creation and be just as amazed, from the building block of matter, the tiny atom with dozens of components man has already identified and observed in the varieties in the elements recognize by science; likely we are still on the frontier of our understanding of matter; to the mystery of an endless universe, endless to our limits of scientific perception, which expands with every new way of perceiving matter, from telescopes to light detection or what ever they used to “see” into space.

Why did God make it so big and intricate that it is mind-boggling if we try to understand much of it? With reverence I would suggest it was for his amusement and joy of creating what he could; much more as we also try to create something new with that drive to push out and try our ability to create, an instinct we definitely have from him. Art, inventions, architecture, infrastructures, and literature are examples of this divine drive to create what we can because we can. So God loves His world- the universe, and pays attention to the smallest building blocks of matter even as an artist focuses on the smallest element of his work, in order to create the big picture of his vision. The universe is this picture of his creative imagination that he created for himself to express himself.

It is not enough that God made an infinite universe. He created life in order to relate to his creation somewhat on his level. A pagan writer noted that “we also are of his offspring”. We are made in his image, an idea we accept by faith but can’t fully describe in all the dimensions of that hereditary factor as we do not know our Parent even as we do not fully understand ourselves. What we can be sure of is that it is a dimension of his love that he wants someone to relate to, so he made children like himself to have that contact with. If there is any downside to God’s love, it is that it makes him lonely when he is alone, or has too few children for his expansive love. How he yearns to have more children to love, who will know and recognize him and love him back! How he yearns to expand the number of recipients of that love!

Throughout the eons of our time measurements he most likely has created countless worlds of creatures, plants, matter, and people to relate to. How many worlds have opted to freely love him when given a choice as we have been, and how many made the foolish choice of our first ancestors who imagined God may not have told them the whole truth? In his infinite love, he desired to give his created children the choice to love, trust, and listen to him. How beautiful it is of that love that he also finally seals that choice for those who recognize him, giving them respite and eternal joy in Heaven! Apparently he can’t stand to let the Deceiver plague us beyond this limited earthly life. He wants to gather his loved ones to himself to be safely with him, as we say, forever. That may just be the next step of his eternally creative love. Meanwhile, he has a wonderful “time” creating new worlds and new peoples in his ongoing quest to pursue and enlarge the fellowship of those who know him. He welcomes those who know his heart to participate in bringing multitudes into his fellowship of infinite love. Sept. 21, 2009

                                            Why Did God Come to Earth as Jesus?

Why did Jesus come to earth as a man? Is that a question asked too many times to still be fresh? We can answer the question simply- “Because God so loved the world” Yet in this season another insight comes to me that I may just have touched on in my blogs but not fully That's the issue- can we grasp the whole meaning of the WHY it had to be that way.

I have long been enthralled by the mystery of the infinity of God. His power is infinite. He knows all things, He created a universe that is always expanding physically as scientist are looking further into space. As electronic microscopes and other ways of measuring the infinitesimal, building blocks keep getting smaller and smaller and more complicated. The human body no doubt has complexities that will keep scientists and the medical profession preoccupied for ever, to understand all aspects. One could also ask philosophical questions like, “If God is all powerful and good, why doesn't he solve the world's problems in a blink of an eye?”

The more I think about God, and I have been asking questions for over 7 decades, the more I am convinced that I know only a very slight amount of the whole nature of God. How much more is God, than suggested by the above questions? I feel lost, bewildered, and humiliated to think that I have thought that I know about God to any extent. Actually, the more I think, the less I believe that I know much of the entirety of God- what he really is like as the whole of his nature. This is where Christmas comes in.

God did want us to know something about himself. Not his whole nature; we can push that out endlessly with no assurance of satisfaction. But what was important to God that we should know about him? What really does he care about, for us to know? What is important to him for us to know? That is what Jesus came to show us. He did not answer all our questions about God; only what was really important to God for us to know about him. To study Jesus is to learn what was in the mind of God in sending Jesus. This is a life long pursuit. I expect we will have major surprises about God when we get to Heaven! We can only learn here and now what God wanted to reveal about himself in sending Jesus. (And later from the Spirit) I couldn't more than begin to say here what God wants to tell us through Jesus, but we know he waned to declare that he is basically love to us in every situation. That he has a way for us to live that is superb beyond the imagination of mankind. He also wanted us to know that he loves us in spite of our childish, rebellious heart that is often very foolish. He even takes the blame for us and forgives us of all that.

Jesus came to show and tell us about the nature and will of God for us. God is so different infinitely that we would have no grasp of who he is had he not become one of us to radiate forth his true nature- at least what he wants us now to know about him. (I have mused to wonder if he has come to all of his fallen nature- animals- atoms- in many other forms to show who he is. But that is another subject.) We just see that he had to become one of us as we would not have grasp what was most important to God for us to know. Yes, Christmas can have more meaning for us every year as long as we live, Because God has a lot more to show us about himself, I am convinced. (See the blog “God our Loving Creator” 2/5/13 for more on this infinite God.)

                                       To Like and To Love

            (For anyone contemplating marriage, or weighing their relationship)

When do you like a person and when do you love someone? If you like being around a person, is it because you love them[him or her], or like the person for the pleasant feeling it gives you to be there? Obviously you don't really like being with someone if it is unpleasant to be there even if you would make some sacrifice for the person out of love.

To like a person is to feel good about their presence because the person makes you feel good. But love is a commitment not limited to the good feeling you get from being in harmony with that person. It is caring about the person whether or not you may like the persons at a given moment.

It may be that before marriage, you may like a person very much, but would not be willing to make a sacrifice if things got really rough in your relationship, or if you were very disappointed in that person. After marriage, in the commitment of faithfulness and permanent love, you are committed to to care regardless how you feel, whether or not you like how the person is relating to you at the moment or generally. Thus it may be that liking the person dominates the relationship before marriage and love is the commitment in marriage.

So, when you cuddle up to your partner, is it liking or loving? If it is only for your own feelings, it is liking. If it is also because it makes her or him feel good, it is also loving. It is both when it is what you both want to give to each other and what you want to receive and it makes you both feel good. It is the same for sex. It can be mutually positive, or for the benefit of one more than the other.

If closeness is only for the liking of one of the person, it becomes a matter of self interest, and becomes a turn-off for the less interested person. Unless closeness is for the sake of the other person, unselfishly. I suppose all relationships should keep a balance of loving and liking: or loving above liking. Certainly to love a person you don’t like some imperfections in part becomes a test of a real relationship. Hopefully, one both likes and loves the person you marry. Usually in marriage one discovers traits you don't really like. It is love that carries you through in the commitment to a permanent relationship.

                                    When You Really Love A Person

You care as much or more about the other person as you do about yourself.

You are often looking for ways to please the other person.

You can keep on loving even over time, trials, and distance.

You would rather see the other person happy than yourself happy.

You can share unpleasant tasks with the other person as well as fun activities.

You can listen carefully to the other person even when you disagree.

You will think what is good for the other person and not only what pleases yourself.

You will often give in to the other person.

You will say it kindly when you disagree with a person.

You can wait for many things, like lunch, going somewhere, or sex.

You can discuss reasons and issues, beyond your own feelings on them.

There is time to plan your life with the other person.

You want to learn about this person as long as you live.

You want to be within communicating distance to this person as much as possible.

You seek common agreement with each other;

You try to agree, not emphasize disagreement.

You will want to do many things in life with this person.

You want the other person to become all he or she can be in life.

Your feelings for this person grow and you discover new reasons to love.

You can see the other person's weaknesses and still love the person.

Even after an argument, you would still sacrifice your life for each other.

Your love is a two way street; you both love each other.

                                         Loving With Heart and/or Mind

We love with our heart when that is who we are. We love with our minds when that is just what we feel we should do in the situation where we find ourselves.

God loves because he is love. He does not decide that he should love people because of their situation. He just loves because that is his nature. We may love because it is the social call for action; for example, if someone gives us a gift. Or because it is the right thing to do to be consistent with our beliefs, like loving the unloving person next to us.

There are persons who, like my mother-in-law, loved because of her heart of love. I doubted she gave it any thought that she should hug us whenever we came to their home. She was just being who she was. Her husband also could show love, like hugs, but it seemed more because it was just the appropriate thing to do- not as spontaneous with joy and affection.  

When a couple prepares to sleep at the end of a day, they may hug or cuddle spontaneously. But after they have slept and one wakes up, he or she may consider whether snuggling close would be love if it may disturb the partner. Perhaps loving intentionally would be to leave the person alone. This would be loving with both heart and mind. Thinking what love would be in that situation.

If a person tends to love with the mind frequently, fitting into the situation suggesting loving expressions, can one shift, to become a person loving with the heart as well- loving from the depth within? It could be assumed this could happen with a married couple if the mind-loving person thinks about loving and responding to the love initiations of the partner. Perhaps also by being loved, a person may acquire a sense of love that had not been strong in his life earlier. It may also be that when a person shows love as a part of Christian commitment, e.g., perhaps as a missionary, or pastor, a spouse, or anyone, a capacity to love from the heart will also grow on him.

Another source of growing to love from the heart may be that of fellowship with God. Recognizing God's love in a person's life in so many ways from birth or before, may lead one to be a more loving person when one is thankful daily for that continuous love. Why not also ask God to give you a heart of love so you can love spontaneously and not just because it is the suitable things to do?

There should be various ways, then, that a person can grow in loving with the heart, rather than loving mainly where loving is the expected response. I have learned to be much more loving from the heart to my spouse by living a life of loving many people I meet in life. In Belize, it was the children and needy person who came to us daily. Loving them intentionally has grown in me a heart of love far beyond that which I had as a youth. 

                                                        This Ole House

There are some things that sometimes seem to preoccupy us which ordinarily are somewhat less time consuming. Currently, one such thing is a rental house we have had since the early 1980's. It is about 150 years old and has survived many other old houses in Elkhart.

 It is hard to know where to begin telling about “this ole house” The saga began about a month ago when we got a morning call from the Elkhart Police that they had visited the house on an issue with their dogs. He said it was in all confusion and smelled bad and that the Code Enforcement might want to see it. They did come out in a day or so and did not even go in because of the roaches all over and on the furniture on the porch where somebody was helping the residents clear the house. They posted it for non-habitation. After that police report I gave them a letter demanding they move out and take whatever with them. But in a day or so “Code” demanded extermination and a new inspection. But with all the stuff, it could not be exterminated until stuff was removed. All 3-4 huge trailer loads. Loretta sorted through so much and much good was mixed in with mattresses, clothes and just plain trash. (We saved perhaps 20 bags of stuff for the lady of the house who is in jail, storing it across the street in a garage of ours.) Why did they hoarded so much and not pay rent? E.g. I counted about 200 tin can of food scattered in the house including two cans of peaches under the two beds!   “Code” was unsympathetic and gave us the options, perhaps their choice, whether the house should be demolished or repaired.  I told Conrad I was at my wits end and ready to give up. He said the house would be worth $20,000 if we’d fix it up. I gave him the charge. He said he fixed up about 10 houses like this and saved them from the city’s obsession to tear down all old houses.  So the plan was, to empty the house and back yard and downstairs and paint everything and tear out the carpets that were likely the cause of the smell. So that occupied our time the last 3 weeks. Yesterday Code was out again and told us all the things to fix and for us getting ready to sell it. We are so thankful for Conrad’s expertise and leadership in all this. 

Today (November 28) we are taking the day off, the first in a while. In all this, I learned how little emotional and physical strength I have for much stress. Daily after several hours on the job I would be physically and emotionally exhausted. So this is a day off, for doing homework of gathering up leaves and work on my own agenda. Thanks for wading through my story of the past month

                                                          My Co-Driver

For years it has troubled me that when we are in the car and I am driving as usual, she makes many comments about my driving. I am in the wrong lane from where I want to turn off, or going too slow or too fast, or catching up on the car ahead of us. When I glance over at her, it really seems that often she is sitting on the front edge of the seat and leaning forward, much as if she herself was driving. No amount telling how her “co-driving” bothers me and even may distract me from my best driving, she just can’t stop helping me to drive.

Today I discovered a new insight for all this. While she has often said that she is only helping me and helping us be safe, I thought there must be something else going on that I am missing. It seems to me now that her main language of love may be in action here- companionship- being close to me. This same expression is dominant in our morning devotions where we sit close as she reads and she usually affirms my praying with an amen. She also likes when I sit with her as she is watching TV, and welcomes me to leave my computer attention and come enjoy her entertainment. In many other ways she subtly, if at all, expresses some affirmation when I share activities with her.

Perhaps her driving advice may be an expression of just how close she is to me when I am driving. She shares her driving style- e.g., lane selection as soon as you turn a corner- as an expression of her style, more than as criticism or correction of my driving. She often expressed that she is just helping me, which I appreciate when we approach a busy intersection like Johnson and Modell Avenue- when I can admit my need of her watchful eye. So pervasive is her style of closeness to me when I drive, that may really be an expression of her heart to me. I want to test out this foundation of her comments as I drive tomorrow and see if it really seems to be wholly true. She always insists she is just being helpful. Maybe she is, and could be accepted as such if I could overcome my self-sufficiency and pride as a driver, and accept her well-meaning “co-driving” as caring closeness in the serious business of driving. 

                                                  What Do Retired People Do?        

                                                    (At least one such person)

Last Sunday when I was greeting people in church, one man ask me how I was doing and then, what do you do, knowing that I was retired for some time. I responded,”That is a good question. When you don't have to go to work anymore, what do you do?” He recognized the issue and problem, and agreed that one needs to find new things to do with an abundance of time available when one no longer needs to “go to work”.

We then talked of some things I do, like spend a lot of time on the computer with the myriad of things one can find there to do. He seemed to understand and did not show scorn over that. How nice! And then when I mentioned that we have a large back yard to occupy time, and also that we have several rentals to maintain, he seemed to be even more understanding.

This conversation led me to think of what all I actually find myself doing. To think through this, I don't know whether it is better to list thing by importance to me that I do, or by how much time I spend doing them. So let me just list some things I do beside the above mentioned, and what it may even mean that I do the above things.

While it is most impressive  to working people that I maintain property and manage several rentals, that actually takes very few hours per month unless there is a change of renters and a house has to be updated.  And working outdoors also is mostly a summer job, and then I get tired physically after only a half hour or an hour of hard work- even if it is mostly walking. Besides it makes no money!

I get credited a lot if I say I work with Hospice, sitting with old people in their final days. Yet this has usually occupied no more than several hours a week and sometime none for a month. Most valued by most friends of mine but little time spent per month on an average. Sometime persons I sit with never even know I was there, or would not remember it 30 minutes later. But there also are most rewarding contacts with patients and families who appreciate our support...

Something that takes more mental and Spiritual energy than physical is keeping up with about 6 families in Belize that were close to us when we were living there. They call once or more per month explaining their needs and concerns and I have to decide the best way of helping them, which often includes sending money for the basics of life, including food and medical. And how much counseling can you do over long distance telephone or texting?

Few understand what all I can do on the computer that is interesting, amusing, and some even outgoing for others. Games are a challenging past time, and also entertaining and even helping to keep my mind sharp. Reading news headlines, I always do, and follow up with items of interest. Sometimes I feel I travel around the world even before our family devotions in the morning. (More on praying later.) Of course there is email, keeping me informed some about the church, friends and much irrelevant stuff I just erase. Equally informing or more so is Facebook, where I have to scroll down a lot to find anything of interest, but I also get news from family and friends that I would never get otherwise. It is my best source of info from some nieces and nephews. Some time I share my “wisdom” in responding to comments and news items.

Then also the computer is the writing tool for current thought which may help me clarify my thinking and keeping me informed of what I believe! Then there are my blogs which number over a hundred entries by now, where I share matters that may challenge many, which I also value. It is a ministry as I check in on the many “page views” responses of people from around the world who check in on each writing. Sometimes I have to pray for people in Korea, Russia, and anywhere else in the world who may be mulling over my writings. So the computer offers many opportunities to socialize, and exercise my mind and reach out to challenge many. Certainly time can be wasted on the computer but it offers such a variety of opportunities for the good in entertaining, mental exercise, and outreach. Presently I am also writing my biography, including much writings about our 25 years in Belize.

I mentioned prayer in connection with blogging, and news around the world gives much basis for praying intercessory every morning. It often feels we travel around the world in praying, dipping down in Belize, Bangladesh, Puerto Rico and many other places. Nearby are also neighbors, renters, the church and many more. Abroad are missionaries who need our support in prayer, including some of our family anticipating mission service. We pray for the work of the Spirit around the world moving people to seek the true God.  It gives me ambivalent feelings to sit there in the living room in the peace of the morning with relatively no worries of my own, no crises I am facing compared to that which I know millions of people are struggling with. I wonder how I can worship God and be thankful in a world where I am exempt from the hardship millions of hopeless refugees and famished are struggling for survival. And even Christians many places live in greater peril of their lives than ever.

So there are many things for an older person to do. In fact there are so many, including distractions that one can daily wonder if one is using the time wisely. I often think how I may feel in a decade or two when many things possible now may be more difficult, and there is no going back to the good old, old days of my present life.                                                                                     October 22, 2017

                                  Eighty Things for Which Life Is Too Short

Life is too short to

(Excuse numbering)

71. Spend half your earning life paying off the house you live in.

72. Spend more years of pursuing education than you will find useful in your life.
73. 
    
74. To wait to really know your children until they are grown up.

72. To spend long weeks just to make a better living.

72. To wait until you are secure financially to find out what was really God's plan for your life.

76. To neglect learning to enjoy nature as God's wonderful home meant for you and everyone.

77. To give second place to God when you expect to spend eternity with him.

78. To fail to show personal love to your spouse every day. (if you marry)

     79. To not observe how your parents went before you into their aging years; you will be there before you realize what happened.

80. To realize how short life really is until it is almost gone.

                              

                                Eighty Things I Still Wonder About (Just curious)

71. When I read of the amazing discoveries of astronomy on the vastness of the universe and the great age of stars, I wonder how anybody can imagine it all just happening by itself without an even greater mind and powerful Being behind all of it, still far Greater than we can imagine.

72. I still wonder if heaven is anything like people have thought of in history- whether it is more like here on earth perfected, or almost totally different in many dimensions. Will there be animals in Heaven?

73. I still wonder if there are any perfect marriages. If any think theirs is, are they bored, or supremely happy.

74. I always thought of myself as being of perhaps slightly above average in intelligence but some tests have suggested perhaps a higher IQ than I ever thought of myself. I wonder. Well, so what?

74. Is hell actually what many have thought as like an eternal, burning fire? When I stood before a blazing brush fire, I wondered if any God could have the will to cast any person in there. I wonder if it may be any longer than just until the person has died. To realize there is no turning to God might be hell.

76. Will we be spirit beings in Heaven, or more like the present? Will we see God physically or Spiritually?

77. I wonder if God has been pleased with my life, or if he just forgives and loves me anyway.

79. Will all people be judged alike by God, or does he have a much more complicated way of looking at people than the way we do.
80. 
    
81. I wonder if God will grant my prayer to take me to him easily as I pray, or if it will be like a long examination before I can go. And when?

80. I wonder if I should just relax and trust God and quit wondering so much.

                              Eighty Things I Want to Do In My Remaining Days

71. Take care of myself, my wife, and my home as well as I can.

72. Follow through with my great grandchildren and be as close to them as I can, hoping that as many as can will have memories of me as they mature and grow up.

73. Be active and reaching out to people close to us outside of our family, like neighbors, tenants, and our close Belizean friends to encourage them in every way I can and encourage them in the Christian way of life.

74. To pray every day for many- missionaries, especially those in our families, for new believers, persecuted ones, young church leaders, for our own congregation, for our government leaders, and for God to foil the ways and plans of evil doers who cause much harm to people, as well as for God's comfort to impoverish persons, refugees, and others who suffer.

75. To seek to be good stewards of our wealth and use it for the good of others as well as for ourselves.

76. To encourage a mission interest and focus tor our grandchildren and be supportive to those sensing a call to serve in mission and church ministries.

77. Continue in a writing outreach through blogging and other writing beyond what I have done and make use of other social media as I find ways of doing a broader writing out reach.

78. Enjoy the outdoors as a praise to God, sharing with him the joy of his creation and wonder of beauty, growth, and the cycles of life.

79. Keep my wife as happy as I can.

80. Keep growing in faith and knowledge of the wonders of life in a relationship with our Heavenly Father.

   

            Eighty Things That Might Interest My Grandchildren (and Great Grandchildren)

71. What life was like when I grew up without electricity (let alone electronics and telephone) running water and without an indoor bathroom in the winter, or cars to get around.

72. How much I enjoyed living in Belize for 25 years, in the tropics with so many friends, a relaxed culture, a thousand fruit trees and so much more- like living on the Caribbean shores most of the years.

73. How little I missed American living in all those years- except for family, and why I did not miss anything else.

74. How we traveled through Mexico 7 times and sometimes had amazing experiences where it seemed we had angels watching over us in strange situations that could have been extremely difficult or worse.

75. To read my biography if I ever get it down to size and on e-book- if I ever do.

76. How I follow a regular morning routine that various little throughout the week: make coffee, use the bathroom, check the computer until coffee is ready; and then while drinking it, sit on the couch while Loretta reads a devotional, and then we, I especially, may talk until Loretta is a bit tired and we pray, especially interceding for family, missionaries, our grandchildren abroad. Also for our renters and Belize friends, the government, and wisdom for the day- all these, and nearing each weekend, we pray for our church and churches around the world. Also that God would act in many situations- like with oppressors and the persecuted, and a few more things personally, not always in the same order. Then we bring in the newspaper and it’s time for breakfast, for me at least. All these every morning with the order varying a bit.



77. Our daily life is mixed with a lot of freedom to do what we want to, with Loretta often in the back yard weeding while I am on the computer with email, Facebook, news, interesting articles, games and sometimes music on YouTube while reading. The demand to work at rentals sometimes disrupts a lot of retirement freedom. O yes, it also gives us opportunity to share our livelihood (financial) and conversation with about 5 single parents in Belize about once or twice a month.

78.Can you imagine what it feels like to have 29 direct descendants by the year you turn 80. Names I can remember, birthdays, not so good.

79.  How interesting it would be if you would all note the most important things that happen to you each decade- how interesting your story would be by the time you reach 80!



80. How it feels to be 80 years old when everyone thinks you're much older than you feel.

                                                       It Will Not Come Near You

Each morning as we sit on the couch for our morning devotions we contemplate situations in the world that we are aware of from the news, or things we just know are that way. This morning it was news that fires in California are threatening the homes of hundreds in addition to those who have already been driven away, some 20,000 people, and already 1,500 building have been destroyed. Recently, of course, Houston, Bangladesh, Puerto Rico, and African countries caught in drought, many famishing, have also been heavy in the news. In rehearsing these many kinds of dire needs, many producing great anxiety, dismay, or hopelessness in the hearts of people, we feel burdened and wondered how we should interceded for all these things.

But our praying always starts with thanksgiving for the many blessings of our lives where it seems that God has favored us with so much good and so little to be anxious about. We have no continuous crises of food, shelter, finances or health. And we have some confidence our country will survive. How then how do we bring together all this abounding blessing for us in the face of innumerable calamities and hardships in the world? It almost makes me feel guilty or at least embarrassed that we have been exempt from the world's curses and instead have had security rained upon us all our decades. We have only had occasional reverses which we always pulled through with God's help and have few anxieties today.

Is all this somewhat similar to the experience of David where he wrote:

      A thousand may fall at your side,

      And ten thousand at your right hand;

             But it will not come near you. Psalm 91:7

Yet I have been haunted sometimes by difficulties we have had in the past: a house fire that destroyed our home years ago; struggling finances for many of our first 25 years of marriage; and marital adjustments that never seemed to be fully resolved. And we know that sometimes Christians have fatal traffic accidents. Can I believe David's words as a guarantee for the Christian for all times? Or did he write this at a time of peace within and recognition that God is always near him and is watching over him?

As we are entering “old age” for sure by now, it is encouraging that we can rest assured with David that He will always be with us, even as the Shepherd Psalm, the 23^rd, assured him. We can be confident that even if we are living in a world in turmoil, we are secure in God's care for us. It makes me humble that it seems we are singled out for God's special love- but that's just how He is. So with a grateful hearty we can intercede for the dire needs of the world and pray for God to act by his Spirit and through his people throughout the world, to bring hope and knowledge of his love for all and to all. We pray that all needy persons will have hunger for a “real” God and will find truth and hope in him and have his blessing for life as we do. In His own ways also he can release people of their misery and supply relief for many or all.  

                                               50+ Dead, 400 Injured in Las Vegas

How do we respond to this breaking news this morning? Most of us are horrified as this information comes across the media. On second thought, I realized that it happens every day in our country, and even more around the world. Only it is in scattered events, or far from where we live, usually. We knew that there are deranged people in this world, or people with hurts and prejudices that motive  various persons. to atrocities. What was specific here was that so much happened in one place, for reasons that are totally unknown as I write this.

We can have any of a variety of responses if we are moved by publicity. We may also be reminded as I am, that this is only one place where such violence has happened. The wider question is, how do we respond to the wider problem of violence around the world, which we may be oblivious to, because it is not "news"?

We listened to the news a while sitting where we  have our morning devotions. Perhaps the news just strengthened our usual prayers, that God would be searched for  his comforting love, to be found by a new reason to seek him. The needs of people anywhere, like also Puerto Rica and Houston came to our minds also as  places people have extra reasons to turn to God for comfort. Bangladesh often  comes to mind with weather tragedy much worse than in our own country. I often think of  tragedy and desperation, even as famine which God tolerates as perhaps pains of travail of God, before persons are born to a new life in him. So we pray that God's Spirit would come and suggest to people that there is a God they can turn to for help and comfort.

Tragedy doesn't really make sense to us, yet we persist in seeking meaning. The Christian cannot in the Spirit of Christ be indifferent. Can we do more than pray? If and where we can find a way, certainly we want to. I am just responding off the cuff to all this as I am inclined to do. We cannot pass off the suffering in the world as just natural events beyond our feelings.  

                                                      SAYING YES AND NO

It is essential to be able to say yes and no at the right time and in the right way if one lives in Belize and hopes to keep his sanity, Christianity, and some of his wealth. There are just many times when you are put on the spot where it is either say the word or you will be taken for a ride. There are several dimensions to this phenomenon. It may best be seen by concrete examples.

Kids will pile into your house until you say enough, or you are destined to be driven out of your own house. If you are nice enough to let them in, or naive enough not to keep your door locked at all times, they will stream in. It would only seem hospitable to welcome little people into your house. After all, some certainly are hungry, or looking for a place to hang out or sponge off your love or stuff in your house which theirs doesn’t have. So if you don’t say no at some point, you will feel run over, or eventually out of your mind. It really shouldn’t be that hard to say no. Like, “It really is not a good time to come in.” Or, “We already have enough (or too many) in the house.” Or when you are tired and need rest, “It is time to go soon now or by so and so time”. Most of the time we have kept the respect of kids and youth when we treated them with mature firmness, confidence, and respect.

With too many adults one can also say no in a proper way. After one has listened to them, giving them attention or what they need, they may take a hint or they may not for a while. One can claim busyness or work to be done, or tiredness, especially when one is over sixty. Or you can suggest what you may know is true: Did you say you have to go cook for your children? A key is to give them good attention first and then you can excuse them to leave. If you have any business in town, you can use that for an excuse, even perhaps taking them along part way. They like that usually. If there may be a whole group of women there, you can use the town excuse, or simply say, “Some of you just came not long, some have been here a while. I get tired and need some rest. Let me give you yet what ever you need so you can go and I can get some rest” There are few who would not respond in the right way with that.

When it come to persons asking for money, it is most imperative to give yes and no answers properly, as receiving what they need and know you have is a sure measure for many of the Christian charity you have- or even if whether you are a Christian. That’s not too far from Jesus parable of the sheep and the goats in Matthew 24.

It can be tricky to say yes and no in an acceptable way when people ask you for money. It’s important to be honest. You can’t say we don’t have much when you have a credit line, or to claim you have debts, when you have several houses in the States as collateral. Even if you own a car, they are sure you have money you could give them. To claim poverty is to lose credibility and respect as it is untruthful.

When you know their need, you can give money comfortably. If there is something they could be doing to earn, they need to be reminded appropriately. If they have a man, draw attention that fact that they should be asking him to support his children. Women need to know we believe men have the responsibility to care for their children. The truth can be spoken thus as I did recently; “We are spending and giving more than we are receiving in the states, so we feel we need to cut back as much as we can. If we go like we did the last months, we won’t be able to help anyone in several years.” I said this morning as I often do, “You are young, I am older; you should be able to at least support yourself.” On the street I have said to younger men, “Why should older men like me support strong young men like you?” It is good with single mothers to listen carefully, then tell them which of their needs you feel you can, or should meet. I have refuse paying for gas saying they needed to look elsewhere for that bigger expense. When no little children are involved, you can push mothers to get jobs, any job. All person should gradually learn that receiving help from us is temporary, and they should be on their own normally and as soon as possible.

There is a wrong way to say yes to people requesting money. Giving out of duty, or too lazy to explain why not, or why less should be better, are some wrong ways to just give. Or to give after scolding them, or with stingy heart, or in a way that makes them feel guilty or degraded. Or to give when you believe it is fostering dependence, or a non necessary habit out of convenience, just so you don’t have to not confront them with reality. That does not breed respect for you or in themselves. Saying yes may be the easy, cowardly way of responding to needs.

But you can also say no in the wrong way: In disregard to their real needs; out of selfishness, or with sassing them off for asking. are never good ways to say no. Being angry with them for asking- what if they really need it and you are cold hearted to them?

It is important for Christian with means living with poor neighbors to be sensitive in their needs in love, saying both yes and no appropriately. It needs to be done with the same love and consideration for the beggars’ real needs and self respect. We don’t decide to give on whether we feel generous, but on the basis of what we believe is good for them.

Saying yes and no in the Spirit of Christ is a part of our ministry of serving people. We dare not hesitate long in speaking right out, or at least telling persons we are really trying to find out what we should do. There are limits to our sanity and wallets, but we rarely find out what they really are. We need to test the Spirit to know when enough is enough. Then boldly we must say yes or no in the Spirit of Christ. Usually people will accept yes or no when they know and sense your real love for them.

                                                  THREE VIEWS OF CULTURE

For the many years I had the opportunity of observing and seeking to understand the Garifuna culture in Belize from the vantage point of my own European Amish American culture. I have seen many similarities and differences. Today I can list many strong and weak points of each culture, that is, how well the respective cultures meet the needs, goals, and aspirations of the people represented? However, here I would only like to compare and contrast the ways people view their own cultures. Then I want to suggest a third way we can view culture. This is not a technical study, but a rather casual study of what I have seen and experienced from a layman’s viewpoint and where I have come to as a Christian.

To begin with, I want to note that Garifuna and Amish have much in common as to their history and environment today. Both have been transported from one continent to another. Both are in population of under a million, and minorities where they live. Both are not quite considered main stream, but separate and distinct from the larger cultures around them. One migrated because of outward forces, the other by inner compulsion to find a place where they can live more peacefully. So both have been exposed to another culture from the original and have always been in tension with the surrounding culture. Both have maintained much of the cultures they came from several hundred years ago, and been selective of what they accepted from their cultures in which they now find themselves.

Cultures are always changing. Is that acceptable to us?  Are parts of culture negotiable?  Can we leave it or any part of it, or do we want to maintain it as a whole? The Garifuna in general idealize maintaining their culture as it stand- language food, dress, rituals, holidays, marriage within the group, ways of making a living, living in villages or units in towns or cities. The voices for the Garifuna culture are strong to defend, celebrate, and maintain the culture. The culture is esteemed for themselves to maintain a distinct identity. Garifuna culture is not negotiable, although there is a lot of unwitting absorption of surrounding cultures which constantly challenges the strictness of the original culture- whatever that is considered to be.

Much of the above analysis of Garifuna culture could also be said of Amish culture. The German language is almost sacred. European dress has been baptized by scriptures and made sacred. The Amish live in groups, and stand in tension with the surrounding cultures. Marriage may only be within the group. They maintain rituals, holidays in the traditional European way to large extent. They esteem the culture for themselves but withhold judgment largely from Christians who differ. There is some slow absorption of surrounding culture, but change is strictly regulated, more than Garifunas can do, because the Amish also have strong religious sanctions and boundaries, rules and regulations for membership.

Let me now take one step from my historical culture and take a stance that I have accepted for myself as a citizen of the kingdom of God which transcends my Amish background and culture. When I became a Mennonite, I progressed in a view of culture different from the Amish. In fact, I never fully accepted the Amish view of faith and culture even when I joined that group as a teen  In Kingdom of God culture which I idealize now, many aspects of culture are negotiable, Language, dress, except for modesty; and ethnic marriages are not idealized as in the two mentioned groups above. I can and do adopt various aspects of Belizean, Creole, Garifuna or American culture, with only the principles of the Christian faith to guide or limit me. All else is negotiable. I place no premium on my European heritage, never celebrate it, or parade it even among my own family. I only celebrate the values of the Kingdom of God, and raise them up before others as most ideal, not only for me but for all others as well. We did not try to keep our family language German, nor lament when our children married outside of our specific Amish and European culture. I only rejoiced that they married Kingdom citizens. Had they married Africans, I would be just as happy as I am today. Only Kingdom culture matters.

Social culture is just accidental and incidental, and a matter of choice. It is a product of the flow of our family history. My children live in 3 states and we [lived] in a different country from any of them. So what? Kingdom citizenship transcends place of living, social culture, and ethnic backgrounds. Language is irrelevant as a value in our extended family as well. We probably speak 10 languages, including Chinese, Russian, Portuguese, and who knows what else? Most of the next generation after mine does not speak German. In Kingdom Culture nothing is lost by this diversity of social culture. A profound unity prevails when our extended family gathers periodically and worship and renew our lives with each other because we share Kingdom cultural values. We generally hold that social culture is negotiable, although we do still have strong remnants of Amishism in parts of our extended family. But our highest values are Kingdom culture, and that is the basis of a profound identity and unity.

With the above dominance of Kingdom culture in my values and experience, I have to be humble and respectful when the Garifuna celebrate their culture- their total culture in their holidays and rituals. This is not totally easy when I feel liberated from any specific human culture that I have been a part of. I suppose this is an essay of celebration of Kingdom culture. Perhaps I am proud of it. May I be humbly so. And like the Amish and the Garifuna, I also feel surrounded by other cultures, ever feeling the tension of those cultures which try to invade the only culture to which I am committed- the Kingdom of God. This Culture is where I find my true identity.

Some Aspects of Kingdom Culture That May Differ From Other Cultures:

         Local language with some additional vocabulary;

         Values of honesty, generosity, sensible self-esteem, self-control, responsibility;

         Active love to those of Kingdom culture and those opposed to it, friends and enemies both;  Loyalty to King Jesus, imitating Him in daily life;

         A Service mentality, missional, other centered, community centered;

         Holiday first day of every week, a celebration of our King, for community building;

         Dress not selected by design, style or color, but by practicality, and decency;

          Marriage within those of Kingdom culture, to avoid definite conflict.

                                                                                                 Written in Belize,

                                   Seventy Blessings of God in My Life Updated

71. A sense of call to serve in Belize until it gradually came to us that it would be totally fine between us and God to move back to the States.

72. A comfortable adjustment to life back in the States when we moved back.

73. A strong affirmation of Tri Lakes Church as we merged back into the church permanently, with a celebration day of our 25 years in Belize.

74. Good health throughout the years of the 70s.

75. Regular fellowship with my siblings practically every month, eating in each other's homes and sharing our life experiences.

75. Three of our children living within a few miles and connections with them at our interest and need.

77. Yearly trips out of States with our two children living “abroad” and always welcoming us to stay a few days or even longer.

78. Seeing several of our grandchildren graduating from a Bible college and several serving abroad in missions.

79. Grandchildren getting married, 8 couples in my seventies, married to Christian partners and becoming established in vocations or jobs.

79. The beginning of a new generation- great grandchildren- 6 by my 80^th birthday and another on the way.

                                      Seventy  Burdens of My Life Updated

71. Leaving the beautiful tropic of climate, friendly people, and calm culture, so comfortable and familiar.

72.  Settling into a culture of unfamiliar people, uncomfortable weather most of the year, and a loss of meaningful goals in life.in the States

73. Retirement- the ambiguity of identity without vocation.

74. Repeatedly praised in church  services in ways we felt so unworthy.

75. Difficulty of working physically without soon getting tired and unmotivated.

76. Differing so much with less energy than my wife.

77.  Finding my identity as an old man between my feelings and the perception of others about my age
                 
78. Frustrations of wanting to downsize my life while Loretta is moving forward full speed.
          
79. Finding balance of preoccupation with end of life issues and living fully now.

80.  Seeking balance in my life for the strength I still have, using the talents I have.







                                         Seventy Highlights of My Life Updated

71. On vacation from Belize in 2009, we planted 10 dwarf fruit trees where we expected our retirement home to be.

72. We lived for months in a house in Belize that was unfinished, had no interior doors or cupboards and the upstairs had an accessible door that kids would break through when we were not attentive.

73. We moved from Belize in 2011, shipping a van from Florida with stuff for Belizeans and brought it back with our final personal possessions from living in Belize for 25 years.

74. The same year we move back from Belize, our first two grandchildren to get married, Joshua to Natalie and Andrea to Kyle.

75. In 2012, we went to Ohio for Shiloh's harp performance and to Albuquerque for Charity’s wedding to Darnell.  Nate also was married that year to Alicia in Malaysia, too far for us to travel.
     
76. Three grandchildren were married in 2013, Katalyn to Andrew, Zachary to Marlise, and Leann to Luis. Also the first great grandchild, Abigail to Josh and Natalie.

77. In 2014, the eighth grandchild to get married, Tanner to Kelsey in Michigan; also our first great grandson, Noah to Andrea and Kyle.

78. The twins were born in 2015, Emmitt and Eliza Ann to Josh and Natalie, and the day following Lydia Grace to Tanner and Kelsey.

79. Micah came into this world in 2016, the 6^th great grandchild also to Andrea and Kyle, and a seventh expected in 2017, unnamed, to Kaytalyn and Andrew.

 80. Celebrated my official entry into the old age of 80 with a party at Rachel and Bruce's house.







                                         Seventy Things I Forgot Updated

71. Where I placed my check book when I came home from the store- that was weeks ago.

72. The names of people I knew very well in the past, until I accidentally happen to recall them.

73.How to get on certain games on the computer that I used to play.

74. The name of a stove part as we were conversing among siblings- something I would know very well, to my embarrassment.

75. To turn the motor off when I was went into a grocery store and discovered it only when I was looking for the keys when I came out of the store.

76. Combing my hair right before leaving the house for church services, I wondered why the comb stuck in my hair. When I saw the foam on the comb I realized that I had forgotten to rinse the shampoo out of my hair when I showered.

77. I was looking for an item of food at Aldi's. When a clerk asked if she could help me find what I wanted I was stumped for the name of what I was looking for and had top forgo her help.

78. Fortunately I am not the only one to lose my keys. When I could not find them one time, I asked Loretta and she went out to the burn pile and found them in the ashes, where she had dropped them when she carried twigs back from the front yard as we had come home.

79. At Julie’s overnight I wondered why my glasses were not on the night stand in the morning but a pair I did not recognize was there instead. Actually, I had just forgotten how they looked, having bought them not too many weeks of months before.

80. If I forgot anything else in my life so far that is noteworthy, I forgot what it was.

                                                       Life on The Farm

Thus far in these writings we have only occasionally referred to our life on the farm. It was a way of life so different from the 21st century life whether one lives is the country or on a small lot or in any sized city. It was in another world of anything we can imagine today. Country culture was so different in so many ways, and even more so as we lived without many modern conveniences everyone now takes for granted, at least in the United States. So here I will digress in time and begin back at my early life as a young farm boy and growing up and away from the farm.

The barn was central to much farm activity. That is where we had our cattle, horses, and sometimes pigs as well. It was a second story building with a steep hill going up to the second floor. Downstairs were the animals with a large space-room kind of shed where the cattle were, especially in the winter. It was the job of children to help keep this area relatively clean for the cattle. This meant to throw straw down from upstairs each evening in the winter and spread it so the cattle had a nice place to sleep at night. There was always manure in this shed which was dirty for the animals which is why we had to "bed" the shed every night. In the summer the cows might be out in the barnyard and so we had less work inside each evening. Also we had to throw hay down for the cattle each evening and morning when it was too cold for them to be out on the farm.

An important part of the barn was the stables for cows when we milked them. We usually had 8-10 cows and we milked by hand, sitting on 3-legged milk stools, squirting the milk in pails as we sat by the udders of the cows. Young heifers had to get used to this and sometimes they would kick and spill the milk pail, or worse, get their foot in the pail of milk, grossly contaminating it. On rare occasions we might even be kicked over and have to pick ourselves off the floor. My favorite cow was named Daisy. She was so gentle she hardly ever kicked like that. I believe I sometimes even rode on her back as I brought them to the barn. The cows were in the stalls only for milking and in the barn yards or fields grazing, especially in the summer. It was my job to go after the cows in the evenings to milk them. For some years we had a large pony named Nancy that I rode to go after the cows. I rode bare back and the horse got used to chasing the cows and would go back and forth after the slowest cows at the end of the herd. I also rode this pony/horse on errands to neighbors and at least once rode it to school on the last day of school. I remember once riding behind the school bus trying to keep up with the bus.

Harvesting wheat and oat was an exciting thing for us children. First Dad drove the "binder" around the field to cut the standing grain stalks and automatically tie them with heavy string. Then we boys would set them up in shocks to dry, about 10 sheaves upright with one on top to let them dry for a week or two. Then when it was time for thrashing- separating the grain from the straw, the thrashing machine would come to our farm. It was a big, long machine on steel wheels and pulled also buy a tractor with such wheels. It was especially exciting to see the tractor driver push that big machine up the barn hill into the barn. He turned the tractor around and pushed it with the front end of the tractor. When it pushed hard up the hill, he skillfully kept it straight with hands on hand-brakes, to steer it. It never got away from him, but as I think about it now, I realize that if he had gotten into the wrong angle, it could have pushed the machine to the side and perhaps dumping the tractor over and perhaps on him. It never happened, but it was a tense moment for us to see him push it up the hill.

Sometimes when the barn was full of straw, we would make a straw stack outside in the barn yard. My job was to work either to steer the straw blower so that it would make a nice pile or fill the entire straw shed, or watch the grain on the wagon so that it wold fill the wagon without spilling over the edges. Meanwhile, wagons were loading up the shocks in the fields and bringing them to the thrashing machine and pitching them into the machine with forks. When I was old enough, I would help in the fields, pitching up the sheaves or bundles, or work on the wagon arranging the bundles so that we could carry a full load, at least 6-7 feet high.. If one was not careful in loading properly, the bundles could slide off on the way to the barn, or when going up the steep barn hill. Usually 5-6 farmers worked together, helping each other to load the wheat or oats, and the machine would go from farm to farm. The women had a big job to feed all these in the thrashing ring, as we called it, when it was at our house. The thrashers worked up a hunger so that the expressions was that one was hungry as a thrasher. It was a social event, working and eating together. Usually it was with neighbors whose farms were close to each other.

I mentioned work in the barn daily. This we called chores and all boys and sometimes girls helped there. It involved as we mentioned, feeding, milking and bedding the animals. Usually Dad fed the pigs and we did other things and he helped milking. Especially in the winter it was dark inside the barn and we used kerosene lanterns so we could see what we were doing. Some people had gas lanterns which were brighter and we may also have had them at times. We had to be careful with the lanterns as if they fell over, the oil might spill and catch fire. So we always hung them high, which also lighted up the areas better. We did not have electricity in the barn until I was about grown. Younger children helped with chores in feeding the chickens and gathering the eggs. We got up early in the morning to do chores while Mom made breakfast. It had to be worked out before school time during the school year. My parents were good in scheduling the chores so that we could have family devotions together before breakfast before we went to school.

We always farmed the fields with horses instead of tractors. This was the Amish way of doing it as they believed it was “worldly” to use modern equipment. The first I can remember driving horses was when we hauled hay from the fields. I stood on the front rack of the wagon and drove the horses while two persons loading the hay as it came up at the back of the wagon on the hay loader. The horses had to straddle the row of hay which had been raked together in a long windrow. We had to guide the horses especially around the corners so that the row of hay would come right under the loader and we would not miss any. As I grew older I would load the hay carefully so that it could be piled high and not fall off as we left the field for the barn. One other person was usually on the wagon to tread it down and pack it so it would make a good load. As I grew older I also drove the mower around the field cutting the hay as well as the side rake that brought the hay together in a long row to be picked up by the hay loader behind the wagon. At the barn we would unload the wagon by huge forks that held the hay as it was pulled up by ropes on pulleys to the peak of the barn. Then it was slid over above the hay mow on tracks and dropped, where it then had to be scattered as it would just come down on one pile. The whole hay mow had to be filled for the winter for the cattle and horses. The hay mow or loft was a place for kids to play with brothers and sisters and cousins, often jumping down on the soft hay from higher beams in the hayloft. We might also play hide and seek in the barn as well as basket ball at times.

In the spring we hitched 3 or 4 horses to a plow to get the fields ready for planting corn and oats. Wheat was planted in the fall for the following year. We plowed about 2 acres of ground in a good day which hopefully went from 7 in the morning to 5 in the evening with an hour or more off for dinner. As a small child I was often sent to tell my father when it was time to come in for dinner. Dinner was at 12 noon, so I would go back to the field in time that he could bring the horses up and in the barn and feed then and get into the house by 12. That way they were together on when they could expect to eat. As a kid I was always hungry before meal time and my mother could promise that we would eat at 12 if I could wait to eat until then. No wonder I am stills stuck on that schedule.

I suppose I was about 10 when I started to drive the horses in the fields with the harrow. This farm tool had many tines, or iron springs bent around, to stir the ground after plowing to smooth out the ground to prepare it for planting. As a teen I would then also plow the fields. We rode on the plow and sometimes it hit stones and it would jar the plow upward and sometimes we were shaken off the seat. Dad always operated the drill for planting grain or corn. That had to be done carefully and I probably never did it that I can distinctly remember. I remember we had to let the horses rest every ten to fifteen minutes when it was warm. When the corn was up and growing, we cultivated it with two horses pulling the cultivator and with operating the cultivator with our feet, we could insure that we did not cultivate out the little corn plants. One row at a time we took and it was a long job to cover fields of 10-20 acres.

Sometimes after plowing Dad thought there were so may stones in the fields that he sent us to pick them up with a flat stone boat- just a 4-5 2x6's nailed together, perhaps ten feet long and pulled by horses. Once I know we went out and pulled yellow mustard weeds that were growing so thickly in the hay fields.

In the spring as it began to warm up, probably in February or March we tapped the maple trees in our back woods. This involved drilling holes in the trees and placing there, a small pipe with a wire hook around it on which a pail was hung to catch the sweet water, sugar water, we called it. About everyday, in the right kind of weather we would collect this sap in a big tank on a wagon and haul it to the sugar camp to boil it until it would become maple syrup. It took about 35 gallons of sugar water boiled down- evaporated, to make one gallon of syrup. We would have to keep loading the space under the long flat pan with wood to keep the water boiling until it was “boiled down” to the right consistency or thickness. Sometimes when I was working at that, I would go to the hen house and get an egg or two and place it in the boiling water until it was cooked and then eat it. Which reminds me, I would often help my mother butcher chickens, holding then as she stretched out their heads and chopped them off with an ax on a stump or chunk of wood. Then the chickens would jumped around wildly until they were dead. Then she would dip them into a bucket of hot water so that the feathers could be pulled out. She then cleaned them of small feathers and gutted them.

Farming was a way of life. We probably assumed as children we would be farmers when we grew up, but in teen years we began to think of other occupations and felt that farm life was to simple to be challenging, especially with the Spiritual challenges that we were being exposed to. We also began to think about higher education even as only a few of our acquaintances went on after high school. A change of life style, values, and dreams was in the atmosphere and the simple life on the farm would have to shift to something else, where ever God was taking us in our commitment to him..

                                              Getting Rid Of Our Stuff

When we approached the peak of our income and equity between the ages of 60 and 65 and living in Belize, I felt it was time to develop a sound basis for dispersing much of what God has given to us, especially what was in the form of real estate equity. We could leave it to posterity to disperse, or to disperse it in blocks, such as one house at a time to a charitable cause, or as we finally chose, to use some of our equity in our own ministry. This was to help children in education and with their basic life needs which may also involved their mothers. It also involves widows and persons without skills and jobs or having other handicaps; the poorest of the land. Basic is the concept that God still owns everything he has entrusted to us and we are to make the best use of it. This is called Christian stewardship. What criteria did we use to decide what and who to give help? [While we developed this in Belize, we largely followed this after we moved back in 2011]

We help those near us, who knock on our doors and come to us. We do not seek out needy people since that is not necessary in our case in Belize as it might be in the US.

We try to ascertain who may or may not have other resources from friends and family and relatives who should be helping them. We ask whether it helps them or makes them dependent and less likely to try helping themselves.

We are open to the advice of our Christian brothers and sister, and seek to know if needs presented to us are real or fake. We seek to help on a minimum level with basic needs and avoid “needs” of people increasing like an addiction to our money, where they want more and more.

We have special concerns for children who may suffer hunger, medical needs, education inadequacies because of their parents neglect or inability to provide for them. Parents may need to feel deprivation to be motivated to do their greatest to support themselves, but children should not be allowed to suffer because of their parents. Much spiritual discernment is needed here.

For us it is not only how much we can afford according to our income, but how we can help real needs in the best way. We want to help generously without giving carelessly to those who may become dependent like young women who should try to help themselves with counseling.

We can calculate the rate at which we could liquidate our equity over the next 30 years, but we have only recently reached the peak of logical dispersion, given that we won’t be in this ministry for 30 years. Perhaps only 5-10 years. If there is money left over for other ways to distribute later, we will have to decide about that when the time comes. It is a basic conviction that it is a poor stewardship to hold on to our wealth for 20 years when it could be used in the Kingdom business presently. So when I am given the challenge to help someone with daily bread, or with several hundred dollars in medical expenses, or school tuition in the best local Christian school, I don’t feel loss. I don’t worry that God who creates the rain will not also provide if there ever be a rainy day for us. We need to follow our instincts and the Holy Spirit, with our self interests in money not being an issue, but what is best for needy causes now. When we see ourselves as stewards of God who has blessed us; that He cares for all people like for us, we can freely give as we have been given.