SEVENTY THINGS I STILL WONDER ABOUT (First half)

         “For we know in part…I think like a child…we see a poor reflection of reality…” I Corinth. 13

                          From the book, Icons of My Life, A Celebration of 70 years.

1. How evolutionists can still hold to their out-dated theory in the light of continually discovered complexities of life processes and components, e.g. DNA.

2. How Christians can go to war, potentially killing each other, or certainly people who have not yet heard the Gospel.

3. How rich Christians can pursue a standard of living many times that of 2 billion of the world’s destitute people, most who have not yet heard the Gospel either.

4. How abortionists can believe that the fetus is not sacred human life.

5. How Belizeans and perhaps other people can live in poverty without seeming to worry about their next day’s needs, and keep having babies in that situation. “Take no thought” seems to be what some remember most from the Gospels.

6. How anybody could know the love of God and not respond positively to it.

7. Whether all marriages could be saved.

8. Whether hell is really forever for those who have not heard of Christ, and will those people have some other chance after this life.

9. Whether Tim LaHaye of Left Behind fame is right about his scheme that Jesus will come twice, or three times; and whether Jesus will reign on earth while evil men are still around.

10. Whether I will live to be an old man like some of my ancestors, or go younger like the others.

11. If energy and mass in the universe are interchangeable and constant in totality as science projects, then how much energy did God exert to create the universe?

12. What is culture and what is personality when people do things strange to your way of thinking. like when up stairs neighbors chop down your beautiful plants just so they can see sand in the lawn, or a pastor signs a contract to make payments on a car, but never does even when he can.

13. What heaven is really like.

14. How God decides who should be in heaven and who should go to the other place.

15. Whether born again Republicans or any other Christians will ever learn to love the poor as much as themselves as Jesus taught to love your neighbor as your self.

16. Whether Jesus will return in this century or the next, or when?

17. Are there any marriages in which the two partners are completely satisfied with each other?

18. What would my baby sister Rhoda have been like, had she lived?

19. What would life be like for the remaining spouse when one of us dies?

20. What would my life have been like if I had been loved as much as I wanted to be from the day of my birth until this day? And would that have been good for me? Would my ministry have been better, and I a better person?

21. I still wonder why the opposite sex has to be so opposite. Couldn’t God have made sexuality a bit easier without it becoming boring?

22. Is there an end to space, or an end to the universe?

23. How did God become?

24. Was this the first world with people on it?

25. Are there other kinds of living beings not needing an atmosphere, or temperatures between freezing and boiling, perhaps black matter beings or gaseous beings with spirits and consciousness with whom God relates as he is also Spirit?

26. What was God doing before the creation of our universe? Inventing other physical/spiritual systems and relating to them? And did any other system fail morally like man in God’s creations?

27. Did it take any length of time as we measure time, for God to design DNA and other incredibly complex matters of “intelligent design”? Did he have it all figured out when he started?

28. Of course we are glad we are not moral robots, but does God ever have second thoughts about making man with free choice, and not wishing he had slanted man with inclinations a bit more toward his ways?

29. What kind of feelings does God have about the condition of the world, both the present world, or at any other time in history? Does he go by his feelings to decide when to end it all for our planet? Is he now more nearly fed up than any time since the flood? Will he end it when enough good has happened, or when too much bad stuff is going on, or when ever?

30. How can God be so patient with his children, and still not be indifferent to their sin?

Especially the sins of materialism, militarism, and indifference to the poor and sinners?

31. How can God tolerate all the suffering of the innocents in the world: children, widows, orphans, the impoverished, war victims, et.al?  

                                                       A Call to Care and Pray

Living in the United States, it is so easy to relegate to the back of our minds that Christians in the past have suffered a great deal for their faith. We can also hear the evening news about suffering in Egypt and Iran and elsewhere at times, and pass it off as news, but of little relevance for us in this country. How can this casualness of suffering of fellow Christians today sink into our consciousness as it should when many churches buildings and Christians have been attacked in Egypt in the past 6 months? Very recently, Christians in Iran have been arrested for sharing in the Lord's Supper, because they used wine, how can we be indifferent?

I suggest we listen more carefully to the news and make it a matter of concerted prayer to pray for these who suffer by the hands of those who want to eradicate the Christian faith just as much as Communism tried in the last century in the USSR and other places.

We can pray that persecuted Christian can be strong and not waver.

That they will be bold and discreet in their witness for Christ.

That God will open the eyes of these who see the faith of believers and realize that Jesus is Lord.

That God will frustrate the plans and schemes and of those hostile to Christians.

That the Gospel will flourish especially in Muslim countries even if it has to be underground.

        Praying earnestly and without ceasing for our suffering Christian friends has never been more urgent. Will we be faithful and not hear news so casually- doing what we can?

               SEVENTY THINGS I WANT TO DO IN MY REMAINING DAYS

                                              Up-Dated at 80 Years                                                                                                       
                                                    (Do, Go, Become, Learn)

       (These items were written from 2005 to 2007 and in 2017 and now- in 2018- may be updated on the progress        I have made or am making: “doing”, or “done”.)

                                 Teach us to number our days

                                 That we may apply our hearts to wisdom. Psalms 90:12

1. Spend time with my grand children and great grandchildren, learning to really know them as well, and tell them all the wonderful things I have experienced and learned in my life.

2. Write my biography for who ever might want to know what my life was all about.           (Nearly up-to-date on this.)

3. Learn to relax when I have to.(Quite well)

4. Write essays of things important to me as long as I can. (doing)

5. Cultivate a life of thought and word and relationships worthy of my eternal goal.

6. Travel to Canada again where we lived for 2 years. (Done)

7. Accept the aging process to the end and celebrate God’s goodness in it all. (Doing)

8. Revisit Belize periodically as long as I am able to see the personal growth of the persons we knew in our life there. (Done)

9. Exercise an optimistic view of life regardless what happens to me personally.(Working on it)

10. Learn from those older than me, how to grow older gracefully.

11. Dispose of as much of our wealth as I can for service in the Kingdom and to others while I live, laying up treasure in heaven.

12. Have my hands in the soil and cultivate plants, perhaps have a green house as a living room in my retirement home. (Doing first part)

13. Be more and more, a person of prayer, especially in intercession for the church, missions, and our family. (Doing, and for the world of need)

14. Be a person of interest to my posterity so that they will want to know what the basic motivations of my life have been. (Doing)

15. Live a life of good physical and mental health and function well into my later years, perhaps in the models of my Uncle Manasseh and Grandma Bender.

16. Become a writer for the public on social issues such as education in Belize and materialism and provincialism in the States.

17. Radically diminish my accumulated possessions so that my posterity will only need to sort through what remained significant and essential to my life when I am leaving. (Struggling here)

18. Rewrite my will and keep it updated about every 10-15 years. (Working on it)

19. Keep my wife happy while following the call of God in my life.

20. Help my children and grand children come to a life of meaning where they can also relax and see the lighter side of life and have a sense of humor about life in general.

21. Enjoy as many fruit trees I can in Belize and if there is time left when we get back to the States, do something of that there- maybe with miniature or dwarf trees. (Done, doing)

22. I would like to read the Bible regularly or through in one year to catch all the little details I may have been missing and as a challenge to discipline myself to daily reading in the Scriptures.

23. Keep my mind active and vigorous through reading mature stuff, writing, and relating to people with precise, creative, poetic and acute verbalization.

24. Live in Belize as long as I can, health and marital happiness permitting. (Done)

25. See my great grandchildren growing up as true children of God. (Just beginning!)

26. Grow in the image of Christ, bringing all things, mind, feelings, and heart into his likeness. (Still working at it!)

27. Learn to be more understanding of my wife even when I may not understand her.(Making Progress)

28. Learn to keep my head when all around me are losing theirs and blaming it on me; learning rather to be scapegoat when one is needed.

29. Keep my self esteem intact when others doubt its worthiness, with an open mind.

30. Refuse to stop doing something constructive just because people think I should be retiring or operating a rocking chair. 

31. Cultivate mental astuteness and alertness in every way possible- reading, writing, perhaps memorizing, and deliberate analytical thinking, keeping up with world events, and delving into subjects of new interest. (Doing)

32. Maintain conversational spontaneity and develop it more fully with all ages of persons and backgrounds. (It's not easy)

33. Staying in the mainstream of life of family, church, community, not withdrawing.

34. Learn to play several musical instruments reasonably well, like violin, guitar, or keyboard.

35. Communicate on the internet, perhaps blogging, and especially making available to the internet public, my writings about my family biography, devotional materials and other matters of interest that I write. (Doing, esp blogginssics I have never read such as Robinson Crusoe, and non classic of the Left Behind series, #15-30, and some others.

38. To constantly see new believers in the fellowship where I am as long as I live, specifically the boys who stayed at our home for a good while and all the single mothers we have helped a lot.

39. To see and enjoy fruit from the some 30 different fruit trees I have planted in Belize, and have a new orchard of considerable variety of fruit trees, should I ever be able to do so back in the States. (Also in 21 above)

40. To start looking forward to the next life with anticipation, imagination and confidence. (Doing)

41. Structure my values and activities so that I will have minimal regrets the last decade of my life. (Trying)

42. Inform and prepare my children and grandchildren about the aging process as we are all growing older at the same rate at what ever stage each of us is.

43, Develop a philosophy of aging that will serve me well as well as my posterity.

44. Clean up my past emotional baggage and the present dependencies so that I can be a stable person as much as possible in order to face diminishing capacities in the latter years.

45. Maintain a healthy sense of humor about life and myself. As well as not taking myself too seriously. (Doing)

46. Consider what I want to be said at my Transitional Celebration (Funeral) keeping my legacy goals clear.
    
    
    47. Take my time and hike up to one or more of the beautiful, high water falls in Belize, several of which are within 25 miles from here. (A lost cause!)

48. Make better use of my time than thinking up lists to exercise my memory and possibly bore other people.

49. Take a leisure trip throughout Central America.

50. Move back to Indiana while still in reasonable health and strength in order to be a blessing to my family and who ever. (Done)

51. See structures for some of the work we are doing in Belize such as a youth center, a youth home, a food supply pantry, a scholarship system.(Failed)

(Credit to IRTA Newsletter for next items, #52-60)

52. Take care of my health with reference to eating, exercising, napping, and cultivating healthy attitudes of faith and optimism, humor, and forgiveness at all times. (Doing)

53. Take deliberate care in driving and all activities, keeping focused to avoid accidents and mishaps. (Doing)

54. Learn some new skill or hobby when I need to refocus from service and labor to something more sedate.

55. Avoid getting caught up with any ailment and talking about it until family and others get bored and tired of me.(Blessed so far)

56. Recognize that every day is a gift of God to be used and lived in gratitude to its Giver.

57. Entertain my great grandchildren in our home as much as possible as long as it is possible as my grandchildren reach maturity, doing the same with them until…(6 and counting)

58. Getting professional advice on my health regularly and using good judgment in following their advice.

59. Be involved in service, hobby, or recreational organizations appropriate to my ability to contribute and receive worthwhile stimulation.

60. Use quiet times of waiting for constructive meditation, reflection, and fellowship with God.

61. Develop new friendships as the settings of living may shift from time to time.

62. Continue developing an optimal marital relationship through openness to my own personality and weaknesses, and focusing on her qualities that surpass my own, affirming her as much as I can, speaking her main languages of love including gifts, making up for lost opportunities of the past.

63. Maintain some goals in life constantly so as to keep on track going somewhere, not getting lost and sidetracked by the attractions of a secular and worldly society.

64. Go on at least one trip per year to a place I have never been before.

65. Attend the Belize Reunion in Pennsylvania every few years and visiting my brothers and families in the east as well.

66. Develop new foci in my life as situations of health and gradual retirement indicate, making use of the talents I have to the glory of God.

67. Continue in openness to God for his revelation of himself and his will for me.

68. Cultivate an open and supportive relationship with my wife as long as we both shall live.

69. Be open to the correction and help I will need from others in my waning days.

70. Prepare for the final exam.(Studying about this)

                                           Updated at Eighty Years

71. Take care of myself, my wife and my home as well as well as I can.

72 Following through with my Great grandchildren (6 now) and be as close to them.as I can hoping that as many as can will have some memories of me.

73. Be active and reaching out to people close to us outside of our family, like neighbors tenants, and our close Belizean friends to encourage them in the Christian way of life.

 74. To pray every day for many- missionaries, especially those in our families, for new believers, persecuted ones, young church leaders, for our own congregation, for our government leaders, and for God to foil the ways and plans of evil doers who cause much harm to people, as well as for God's comfort to impoverish persons, refugees, and others who suffer.

      

 75. To seek to be good stewards of our wealth and use it for the good of others as well as for ourselves.

 76. To encourage a mission interest and focus tor our grandchildren and be supportive to those sensing a call to serve in mission and church ministries.

77. Continue in a writing outreach through blogging and other writing beyond  what I have done and make use of other social media as I find ways of doing a broader writing out reach.

78. Enjoy the outdoors as a praise to God, sharing with him the joy of his creation and wonder of         beauty, growth, and the cycles of life.

79. Keep my wife as happy as I can.

80.  Keep growing in faith and knowledge of the wonders of life in a relationship with our Heavenly Father.

Science and the Bible. But they differ in epistemology, the way that knowledge is perceived and acquired. They also differ in a very different worldview. Let us see the two sources of differences of Biblical knowledge and scientific knowledge.

It should never be assumed that science and the Bible generally agree. They may at many points because they are both sources of knowledge and understanding of reality as people understand reality. 

Science assumes basically that the only reality that we really know about is that which we can perceive with our physical senses. That which we can prove and test in a laboratory is true reality, science declares. What we can’t prove must be theory or personal belief until we can prove it. It can not be asserted with confidence to be true.

The Bible on the other hand assumes that reality can be perceived by faith. By believing in God, one can know that God is. And by experiencing what can be experienced in our heart or whole person is reality as much as what we can prove in a laboratory. By faith we know a lot of truth so clearly that we base and structure our whole life on it. We do not ignore what we can learn by science, but we believe there is more than can be perceived than in the laboratory by human tools and methods.

Science assumes a world view that does not need any God, as God is not subject to lab testing and not reality in the scientific sense. Regardless of what short fall there is in science such as the origin of matter, God can thus not be a scientific option as he is not a part a part of the scientific world view. He does not exist scientifically, i.e., as he is not ‘testable’ by human tools and predictability. This does not mean that a man can not be a scientist and a believer in God. The scientist predisposed to believe in God may find a need for God to explain what he learns in science, and he may believe in God by the logic of necessity, but not by scientific proof. The believer only believes in God by faith, and his world view assumes there is a God, which is totally logical to him. His worldview is wider than the world of the scientist, as his source of knowledge is larger, incorporating both scientific knowledge and knowledge derived by faith with a God in it.

The Bible was never written as a scientific treatise with modern scientific assumptions. It was written many years pre-science with a world view that assumes there is a God who is part of the whole existence of reality. The Bible is not limited to the knowledge of 20^th century science. It pre-existed modern science. So it does not even care to be consistent with science, since that is such a limited world view. To assume that the Bible and science agree ignores the different worldviews of the two. To assume that inspiration of the Scripture calls for scientific accuracy assumes that the measurements of science are accurate conclusive and that the Bible should agree with a nonbeliever’s assumptions. It was never written to agree with centuries' later assumption of reality. To measure the Bible by science is to measure God and reality by human standards which are contrived by human beings without a consideration and assumption that there is a God. So to ask if the Bible and science agree is to assume falsely that they should or could agree. The question is rather, how could they always agree since they begin with differ assumptions and epistemology and thus certainly will experience and see reality differently?

Science claims a monopoly on truth. That has the only real and valid dependable truth. It assumes that any other “truth” is suspect, and of inferior validity. Science has captured the confidence of American culture and made religion second class and relegated to it subjectivity, or it being only personal belief. Thus religion is judged by science that claims to be the only valid source of truth. Many Christians are also caught up in this secular religion. They have faith in man, and man’s system of belief and reality. Thus unwisely try to harmonize science and the Bible, something totally uncalled for. Why should we judge an historical document by standards set up many years after the Bible was written? The narrower view of reality can’t possibly encompass the wider view of reality portrayed in the Bible. It is like analyzing the scenery of a valley through a keyhole. Its judgments thus are bound to be limited and inaccurate.

The assumption here is that there is more than one source of truth. We have spoken here of science and religion. There is also folklore, and folk understanding of truth. Much modern alternative medicine that trusts food supplements untested by the god of the scientific community may be considered to be civilized folk medicine. There is also the world of demons and spirits that is as real to its adherents as scientific knowledge. Reincarnation is also a source of truth to some. The western world is polarized largely between the science and religion. But there are still strong remnants of superstition that are neither science nor religion. Friday the 13^th just doesn’t pass from Western thought even with all the deification of science. One should likely not lift up any system of thought and knowledge as the only source of truth. The Bible may not even have the scientific answer for cancer or many other problems of society. As heavily as Western society relies on science and somewhat on religion for truth, consideration must be give that there is knowledge that is out side of either science or religion. Telepathy and premonition may exist outside of either two main western epistemologies. Thus we must conclude with the ancient writer who declare that “now we know in part”, but perhaps later we shall know all that needs to be known.      

                                                Intro to Aging Reflections

I suppose by now most readers realize I am no youth but somewhat advanced in life. Recently I read a book, Rich in Years, by Johann C. Arnold, Plough Publishing House, that has helped me to understand more of my feelings about aging as I am experiencing it. Probably the best book I have read on the subject. Then coming onto a number of writings of the past 6 years as I was moving into this stage of life, I considered sharing with my blog audience a bit of what has happened to me. 

Clearly, every stage of life has its emphasis, but in all, it helps to have a kind of humor about our self-consciousness of our current stage of aging. Aging, of course, begins at birth. I suppose we idealize aging in early life and have second thought somewhere after middle age. Clearly a sense of humor is useful in accepting our “Senior Moments” and I am making a collection of my own.

So following are some of my ramblings as I reflected on where I was going the past years. These were written in the context of living in Belize with many visitors at our house daily, both children and youth especially. They do not reflect where I am in the 2+ years since we retired from Belize. I am still finding my way in retirement and need to consider what that means. So when you breeze through these next writings, smile, (and think) because you will go through some real changes in your life if you keep breathing long enough. If you detect some some instability, well, maintaining balance can be a challenge in aging in more ways than one.

                                WHAT IS DIFFERENT BEING SEVENTY?

                                                     (From 50 or 60)

It is more comfortable just sitting and relaxing a lot. I can meditate easily without even a book with me.

I get tired in doing only a few hours of work; I am tired in the early evening, whether or not I worked much.

I am a lot more analytical; my mind is constantly thinking through issues of the past, present or future, or just matters I come across. I wrote an essay recently on whether the Bible and science should be agreeable, for no special reason at all.

I am thinking a bit more of the ultimate future, how idyllic heaven will be in the presence of Jesus, etc. which gives me a slight thrill of the actual reality what will really be, not in some vague future but almost in the measurable and predictable future, not 50- 60 vague years away.

I can see a long distance back, some things very clearly, absolutely distinctly, while who was here this morning or what all I did today, is something of a haze and I could easily not think of some detail of what happened unless reminded.

I have doubts of my mental functioning when I mistake some of the most obvious things, like looking for the right keys when I stand at a door to unlock it; it’s worse when someone else is standing there with me. .

I am not motivated to plunge into tasks that should be reasonable to do, nor can I make long range plans easily, like, if we move, should we build, buy, or rent?

I am more mellow and can give in more easily to another person than I used to. I also do not like to argue even if I am confident I am right.

Probably I am closer to people emotionally than I used to be and persons are also emotionally closer to me and mutually wanting to express it with touch or embrace.

I am no longer consistently a morning person rather than an evening person, but both ends of the night are too short. The days are too long and the nights are too long, breaking up in the middle of either period for a break from wakefulness and sleep, yet still never do the ends meet without tiredness. The complexity of these statements is indicative of the difficulty of explaining this phenomenon. In other words, I am too tired in the evening and too tired in the morning, with often wakefulness at night and sleepiness by day.

After all, I didn’t turn 70 suddenly; I have been working at it for a long time!

                                                   I Live Cautiously

                                             January, 2009 [In Belize]

Perhaps I was over-confident, adventuresome, perhaps even reckless when I wrote “I Live Dangerously” a while ago. Perhaps I have learned a few things about myself since then. Here are some examples of the other side of my life.

1. When I get out of bed at night, I am careful what I step on lest I stumble; I walk carefully toward the door and back to bed, aware not to kneel on her tiny feet as I return to my back side of the bed.
2. When I drive on the road where there is a wash out, or deep water holes, I drive at a snail's pace, almost literally, lest I once more hit bottom and spring a leak on the oil filter or pan and occur unnecessary expense, embarrassment, and work to repair the damage.
3. I hover around the kitchen when youth are cooking for themselves, like frying an egg, so that Loretta does not find something precious food missing later, much to her dismay.
4. I disallow anyone to use the washing machine on Sundays lest we be over busy, especially when Loretta is studying for Sunday school lessons, so they don’t think Sunday is just another day; telling them they should wash school uniforms before the last day before school resumes on Mondays.
5. I relate to women with reserve lest I stir up inappropriate feelings in the hearts of those hungry for love and intimacy.
6. I lock the door to the computer room sometimes so I don’t have to drive out those off the computer when I want to do something on the computer myself.
7. Sometimes I don’t express my temporary opinion to my wife lest it gets refuted before I am really settled on it.
8. When I can see very well why she is in trouble, I may not give her the answer, knowing she wants sympathy rather than my wisdom and hindsight.
9. I am slow to tell her my burdens, problems, or accidents lest it depresses her and then I have one more problem to live with.
10. When visibility is poor on the local roads, I slow down considerably lest I come suddenly on pedestrians or bicycles.
11. When I need to oppose the ideas or desires of a youth who is demanding or short tempered, I procrastinate giving an outright negative answer, perhaps asking a question instead, showing concern, so that he can tolerate my opposition to his desires.
12. I am gentle in telling Loretta about my contentment to live in Belize indefinitely, and identifying with her in those times when I can almost imagine living back there.
13. When a certain girl who has stolen shoes and perhaps other things comes to our house for something, I warn Loretta persistently to keep an eye on her every minute and not let her get out of sight for a second lest she rob us again. I have banned her from this house.

                                                How Bad Will It Be?                                 

This morning the reality came to me that as I get older, I will most likely have more and more freak mishaps that should have been avoidable if I was more careful. It grew from the experience last night when I was driving on a road that I drive every day and I drove in the middle at one point to avoid pedestrians and as it was dark and rainy, where I knew there was a bad bump. For the third time in the last 3 weeks, I hit a bump in which the low van hit bottom in a way that the oil filter was hit and it bent back enough that all the oil escaped out in a less than a minute. (Actually one time Loretta hit one at the same place I did last night and we picked upon the offending stone and this morning we picked up several more road hazards.)  Each time I had to get a filter and 4 quarts of oil that would cost at least $30.00B [15US$] and then get it fixed by a mechanic or do it myself as I have done the two previous times.

Very recently I read that older people, 65 years and up, have one chance out of three to take a fall every year. I took mine several weeks a go when I was on the farm. There was a low ditch beside the road and I set a bucket in the middle of the ditch to step on to avoid getting my feet wet as I crossed over. I had done this before with good success. But when I came back our with a load of oranges or bananas, the bucket tipped over and I sprawled full length with my down side in the shallow water, much to the amusement of the youth with me and I laughed with them. But it was not funny at all this morning when I had to ride several miles in a drizzling rain on a borrowed bike to get that oil filter and oil and then lay down beside the van to rectify my damage to the van last night.

Old people get blamed for being careless dangerous driver as they age. So do teens. The middle aged people claim to be the best drivers. So at some point we become better drivers and then revert so that at one time we have an accident frequency precisely at the rate of teens; then I suppose we sail on dangerously until the license bureau or the police say we can no longer drive, unless we have the sense to quit when it is time or respond to our family’s evaluation of a failing grade. One older friend had us pray that he would just know when he should quit and then the next week he had a slight mishap at a junction and he felt he had his answer. We can hope for wisdom like that when our time comes.

Some people might have all the answers why people get accident prone as they get older and think we are losing something. I was very tired in the evening when I went over that bad bump in the road and I forgot it was there, also not being able to see 20-20 in the dark. As for the bucket, I took a risk like any younger person might and also have a spill. So likely some of our mishaps are as any person might have in similar situations. Perhaps also we may lack judgment at times, or sensitivity because of hearing or sight deficiency. Certainly one hopes one does not have to be senile to have accidents and mishaps. So partly it may also be a stereotype where age is blamed for some mishaps which are common to all before we are really old!

                                            AGING IDEAS

                            What Some Call the Decades of Aging

10 is older than being just a kid.

The 20's are when they think they are old enough for about anything.

30 is too old to be trusted by youth.

40 is over the hill, or when life begins- but what kind of life?

50 is the old age of youth and the youth of old age.

60 is sorta old.

70 is almost old.

80 is old.

90 is real old.

100 is really old.

110 is incredibly old!

120 is older than anyone living today, probably.

                                                 I DO MISS HER*

It is so different when she is gone. There is no one to talk to around here unless a neighbor comes around. What thoughts I have must be kept to myself. Or what joys I have I can’t share. Like glancing out the front door window and I see a rabbit hunched up in the wet grass and he just sits there for period of time. I must wait until she returns, or like when a neighbor brings me pizza and offers to bring soft drink as well. I have to eat it alone. It is different being alone.

I like reading and listening to old music and videos. But when I find an amazing video of the newborn grandson, just 12 hours old; and the beaming mother who is so full of love, joy, and total peace so soon after child birth, I must wait until she come home to share it. When I want to share it with this mother after twenty some years, she also is not there. I must retreat to the lonely house and go about my business.

My first real bout with alone-ness was the first morning after a very restless night being awake a lot with muscular aches and pains like flu or malaria. I am alone to bare my misery. When I get up, I feel just the same with tiredness as well and feel like retreating to the bed where I had no comfort before. How I wish I had someone with whom to share my misery and get some comfort! It is not too bad to sleep alone, while I am sleeping- but to wake up alone when I am miserable, that is something else. I struggled through the day and was releaved by the afternoon. But I was still alone. I called her on the phone and got a little pity, but it was nothing like her presence when I was miserable.

Then there are the little inconveniences, like deciding what to cook and then to eat it alone. The dishes still just sit there this third morning. With that cut on my thumb, I would have a good excuse to have her do them if she was here. Actually I wouldn't even have to have any excuse- she would just do them. But can I wait to have them done till she returns? What a welcome that would be to her! And a confession of my ineptness of living alone. I also then think of what it would be like if I was always alone. I think of persons I know well who have been alone for years. I just can’t imagine being happy that way. Would I get used to it? I doubt it. True, “it is not good for the man to be alone”.

*Reflections when my spouse was away in Ohio for several days, and selected to blogging when she was away volunteering at the BABE store.

                              LET GOD BE KING AS HE REALLY IS

When I constantly hear and read of certain conditions in the world, it seems things are out of the control of any human beings. I hear daily of Syria where there has been war between people and government that just won't end even after several years; and 120,000 people have died in that conflict and about 2 million are refugees in neighboring countries. In Haiti, about 600,000 people are still displaced 2 years after a hurricane and dependent on outside help for survival. In Iraq, after one dictator is removed, there is still strife with reports of 40-60 people killed in a day, repeatedly. If our country tries to solve Middle East and other problems, it seems hopeless. Our government just can't decide what course of action would be helpful in the short or long run. Trying to help may make things only worse in the future. It seems there is no human answer to these problems. If anything is to happen, it seems God has to intervene and resolve matters and bring sufficiency and peace among people. Or will He just let violent people destroy each other? No answer has been found to resolve these issues.

When the Virgin Mary sang at the coming of the Messiah, she said, “He has brought down rulers from their thrones and lifted up the humble; he has filled the hungry with good things.” I am driven to plead for God to intervene in all this mess if anything is to change anytime soon. I recall Joseph Stalin, the murderer of 20,000,000 people, died suddenly as by the hand of God. I understand people around the world were praying for God to act. Abraham asked, “Shall not the judge of all the earth do right?” Is it too much to plead with God to take action where only he can end the bloodshed and violence. “Be the Lord and King of King that you really are,” we can plead.

Certainly we pray for God's people to wake up and also act responsibly to alleviate the hunger and desperate needs of multitudes made refugees by strife and disasters. But God must move by his mighty arm to bring justice and relief to multitudes in dire need for security and the daily needs for survival. What if God's people would join together and cry out to God to resolve conflicts while committing themselves to be faithful in the things they could do to minister to the needs of the destitute? Consider joining us in pleading for God to act and bring down strongholds of oppressive governments and bind hostilities which only increase suffering. May He also stir his people to do what they can in his kingdom to let it come to all suffering mankind. May he comfort those in desperate need and open their eyes to his concern for them so they can call on him for help.   

                                                 How is God Present With Us?

It seems to me that God must be all we can imagine and far more than we can imagine. He simply will not stay in any box we put him in, in our current experiences. I am amazed how our perception of him changes in our life time.

In a worship service several years ago, I was musing how we viewed the presence of God with us throughout my life time. It seems this has shifted some from one decade to another. In earliest years we imagined that God was able to be everywhere and so could be around us and see us and knows all things about us. As we became Christians, it was Jesus the Lord and Savior who was our companion. He promised in the Great Commission to be with us always and we felt he was in his Divine person who used to be human earlier. As the Charismatic movement came along, God lived within us by His Holy Spirit who filled us, empowered us for service and to live the Christian life. Later in my teachings in Belize, it was that Spirit who was really the Spirit of God and the Spirit of Christ and I wondered for some years if the Holy Spirit had any other identity than that of being the outreach of God and Jesus. Only two persons of Divinity and one Spirit for them. I have never read this confirmed by any writer nor anything in Scripture to indicate other wise. Now most recently, in the last month, I again experience Jesus as a person who speaks and makes his presence known and felt in my spirit as well as emotional if not physical feelings. I can’t quite describe or explain this, but it is like the real Jesus, close to the historical Jesus is present and speaks to us in our hearts and minds and clearly doesn’t want us to let him out of our fellowship. Several months ago I was asking myself if I loved Jesus. I had little feelings although I had a strong commitment to follow him in all ways, including living a life of obedience and no compromise with sin. Now, this Jesus is near and it is such a great experience, I can say I know I truly love him and never want to have him leave me in the way he is present presently. I would cleanse my life from anything to make him feel at home with me. It is also an emotional thing where I had to cry tears the other morning as I reviewed some of his many kindnesses to me in my life. I hope Jesus stays with me always in this way. I would do anything to have him stay. I believe he wants to stay close.

Yet since I wrote the above about 3 years ago, God is still showing himself in new ways. When I read about the vastness and supposed age of the universe, I just wonder how he would even want to keep contact with each person even in one world such as ours. But I wonder if he can still think of us also, what a wondrous God we have. It is mind-boggling also to read of our amazing body, (Reader's Digest, September 2013) “100 billion neurons, ( or brain cells), which each “fire” (talk to each other) five or 50 times per second” traveling as fast as 270 miles per hour so that we can recognize an object and identify it, i.e. a cat or ball. It is equally hard to imagine that each DNA molecule may have 80,000 distinct parts, scientist being proud they can a map them, but each hold information equivalent of a set of encyclopedias. Or a heart that can beat 100,000 times in day for many years. I am beginning to wonder if life goes on like a clock God made and wound it up, or whether God is the life where ever it exists. In all this, is God still personal caring for me? I just get the feeling I know a lesser amount of all he is than ever in my life. Do I know one percent of who he really is? I don't know.

Yet when I start talking to him in prayer each morning, he becomes so real my eyes water as I set before him my concerns for the day for me, my acquaintances, as well as my concerns for the Middle East and all world problems which only he can solve. He has made me and all his faithful children partners to help him bring in his Kingdom where the world once more will be as he originally intended. I don't know what side of God I will see tomorrow and the day and year after that. I doubt that I will ever see all of God, probably not even in the next world. But I only know, He will be more than..!

                                                             My Dreams

Taking off from the worship service today, I have several dreams which I would like to see accomplished. The Pastor suggested we write down our dream and then list 5 steps we can take to accomplish them. I highly recommend doing this for any serious Christian reading this blog!

I first thought about the matter that I would really like to see all of our grandchildren get married to Christian spouses of like mind and see them commit themselves to a life of service and ministry, whether their lives would be spent focused in mission or a vocation in which the call to bring Christ to the world in some way would be a central goal of their lives.

The second goal came to my mind, that of wanting to live after this life in the future generations through my writings, realizing that we know so little of the character of our near ancestors beyond where they lived and moved around.

A third dream is to see a better world where there is peace, basic sufficiency, and a knowledge of the Gospel. This we are working on by intercessory prayer for missionaries, for God's spirit to enlighten the hearts of those who hear the gospel, and for God to tame down the madness of men and ethnic groups and nations so that humanity might have security and decent living.

The first goal of a continuing legacy can be worked at by

        a. Fellowship with the youth as much as possible and have a relationship with all of them;

        b. Praying they will find spouses of equal commitment to service and mission;

c.       Let our concern for a mission be an example to inspire them;    

 d. Intercede for them regularly as they make choice and  training for life.

The second dream can be worked at by

           a. Learning how to market my writings by relating to a professional in publishing;

           b. To learn what can be done through the social media of website, blogging or other;

           c. To continue writing but with an audience and media in mind;

           d.  Relate to family through mass e-mail of current  and new writings.

The third dream can be worked at by

           a. being informed specifically of world events in the nations and evangelism and relief efforts        by organizations;

           b. Praying intercessory for missionaries and relief workers;

           c  Pleading for God to work by his sovereign powers to bring down government and ethnic strongholds that destroy human society through oppression, violence, and corruption;

          d.  Praying for the national churches to be burdened with the needs of the world and the churches and God to call forth workers into the global field of needs;

           e. Praying for political sanity and wisdom  in our government to work out problems that are for the good of this country and other countries;

           f. Helping with our own financial resources as possible to support the work of churches in carrying out the gospel mission of message and alleviation of poverty.

                                                                                                   September 2012

                                                                                                                                 

                                                     ME AND DAD

                                                  From My Biography

My earliest recollection of my father is when Christmas would be only a few days or a week away, he would take us little ones on his knees and sing “Silent Night”. Of course he sang it in German as “Stille Nacht”. Then one of us would ask him how many nights until Christmas. It was an expression of love to us to teach us one of his many songs that he loved and wanted us to know. It is not hard to imagine sitting there perhaps as a 2-3 year old, nestled in his arms as he sang to us. Actually I don’t remember his voice as much as the fact that we would excitedly always ask him how long until the Day.

He was enthusiastic about his children, picking them up and sometimes in a high pitched voice call us “lieb kindly”, translated loosely as "beloved child". From our earliest days, we were important to him and he enjoyed being with us when the day’s work was done, or even when he came in for dinner, or even when we would go out where he was working. I have more feelings about those encounters then actual incidences that come to my mind. It seems he would always talk to us, although he would also be in deep meditation or rehearsing some relationship with some else and talking to himself barely audibly. He was a sociable person, not content to just be tight lipped. He was communicating whether the person spoken to was there or not. Sometimes we would ask him what he said. He was probably surprised and wondering what we had heard.

Occasionally I made the trip to town with him to do some shopping for groceries or what ever else we needed. Our horse Bobby was never in a hurry and would take about an hour to travel the 7 miles to town. As Dad would go from store to store, I would try to keep up with him. I don’t know if he was always in a hurry, but he knew where he was going and wanted to get his business done. He told me some of his business, like going from one grocery store to another because he knew the price of what he frequently bought, literally saving a penny here and there. He knew the value of a few cents. I suppose that thriftiness bid me well when I was in college twenty years later and had my own sense of economy on what was affordable and where I should buy my things.

I was also with Dad many times when he wanted us to help him on the farm. I suppose he both wanted train us and to have our help. I would drive the horses when we put in hay as the loader brought the hay up behind the wagon and he or a brother would load the wagon to get the most on without loosing any on the way to the barn.  Later I could do that job of placing the loose hay around the wagon until we had a high load. Dad also wanted us around when he “made fence”, either a new fence, or repairing where the cattle had weakened it. He taught me to use a post hole digger, and to sight up posts in a straight row.

I remember once as we were working on a fence in the lane near the barn, he was teaching me a Bible verse, word by word, having one finger designated for each word- five in the first phrase; German words I can still repeat 60+ years later. Only years later did I learn where we find it or what it meant. Scripture was important to him and he also wanted us to know Scripture. He probably helped us memorize verses for Sunday School also, although I don’t recall just what they were. He read to the family a chapter of the New Testament every morning and every evening, and then led in a prayer as we knelt down as a family. Rarely did we go off to bed before he would lead us in this devotional. He cared for our Spiritual discipline in Scripture and prayer, setting an example for us as Mom would help keep it orderly, which was not usually a problem. We realized it was a normal part of our daily life. He did not explain Scripture; he just read it, usually. He did not teach us to pray; he was just an example. It was something he believed in even though it must have taxed him after a day’s work and just before bed. But he never forgot, nor excused himself. Even when we came home from Bible study on Wednesday evenings we knelt to pray, perhaps skipping the reading; after all we had been to Bible study. 

 Sometimes Dad confided to me things in his heart and memory that he could have kept to himself; that Mom had some preference for a girl when I was born; that he had convictions for overseas mission work before marriage, but it was too big a hurdle to perhaps need to leave the Amish church and attend to college; and Mom’s anxiety at some time later, perhaps at the pending birth of a child, the feeling that they had to go to the mission field. He just wanted to spill some secrets even as I find myself doing at times. To these deep feelings I was sometimes the confident.

In the 60’s there was an ordination for the ministry at our church. When I was not even a nominee among 7 others, he comforted me that perhaps those who voted for the successful candidate would likely have voted for me. He also gave be a beautiful affirmation of my sense of call. “I would like nothing more than that you would enter the Christian ministry”, he confided, something most unorthodox for a humble Amishman to say.

I remember his sadness when we left for Belize in 1986 and in subsequent times. He always seemed conscious that we might not meet again, though it was never expressed openly that I recall. I suppose there was usually a little hug and kiss as had been the practice whenever we parted in younger years. He was always telling stories of bygone days when we were back for vacations from Belize. Even after his stroke which hindered his short term memory, he would recall many things of bygone days. Especially interesting to us was his courtship with several women after my mother died. He was so candid and detailed I just had to record some of that at times.    

One memory of some sadness remains for me. After he had the stroke and at times was not so rational, he stayed with us for a week one summer as we stayed on Marion Street in Elkhart. At first he did not want to go into the house with us but stayed in the car and on the sidewalk. But when a black man came along, he was persuaded to come in. Most of the time he was rational but rather glum, like we were holding him captive against his will. At one time he said very unkind words about me about how bad I was.  I didn’t take it too personal as I understood his mental state. But it was sad because he was my Dad and he did not feel good toward me. His last years were marked by some depression, I believe, as he increasingly had to be dependent on his children and was loosing control of his life. He outlived his better days by a few years. One worker at the home where he spent his last weeks remarked, “That was not the Elam that I knew.” Nor the Dad I once had.

Many times in my memory from my childhood to his old age, it seems Dad treated me like I was special. Not that I was more special than my siblings, but that I was someone he cared about and gave particular attention to. He enjoyed me when I was a child. He lead me the best he could in my growing up years. He respected me above tradition in my mature years. It was not hard to forgive him in his fading years and accountability. In his negative comments on Marion Street, I assured him he was not responsible for his remarks. He insisted he was, to me only proving my point. Dad is now gone 18 years, but his memory will live in my mind as long as I have it. My life no doubt is a fulfillment of some of his dreams to serve the Lord locally or abroad, without the necessity of providing for himself as he sometimes lamented, detracting from ministry. Yes, Thank you, Lord, for the Dad that helped bring me in this world, led me, and showed me the way I should go. May I always pursue the path he set before me.

                                                                                                   

                                                         "Don't Blink"

When I first heard the song, "Don't Blink", I thought, "That's kinda cute, what can happen as life slips by." But as I think about it more, I realize that I have often wondered what I was really doing when our kids were small. Somehow, they slipped through those early years while I had my eyes in the books of learning, and only in my spare time, did I really play with the kids. Here I am in early retirement and I see what my life has been. I see my grandchildren starting to get married to begin the same stage of life that went by me all too fast. It now seems like a long blink- well I had my eyes open part of the time. I am glad now that we have pictures to refresh our minds of what was happening along the way; probably over 40 volumes of them.

But what is even more important is what we put into those years. Do we have only memories? Or do we leave a difference in the lives of our children, grandchildren, and with all the multitudes we met on the way to aging? What difference will it actually make that we were here for some decades? It is trite to say we get old too soon? Yet even then few youth can imagine that.  I hope this song of Kenny Chesney helps fix our minds on the fleeting nature of life, encouraging us to keep our eyes open as life flies by. 

And do more than stand on the sidelines watching it speed by. Rather filling each day with 24 hours with living activity, making the world a better place as we get older. I was asked by a psychologist once what I my goal of life is. I said that I want to reach retirement with no regrets what I have done with my life. That was almost 30 years ago. Following the call of God to a life of service in Belize, I have never regretted it for a moment. Now the challenge for the future, is to come to the end of my journey to look back with no regrets of my present life. Enjoy the song.

Kenny Chesney - Don't Blink

Forgive Me Again
Forgive me for saying this, but as I was sitting at Walmart today again, waiting until my lovely and energetic wife  is done shopping, I meditated on why it is that we cannot compromise on the length of time we want to spend shopping. I came to the conclusion that a compromise is a blending of two matters- two durations in this case. Some mathematical facts gave me insight on why we can't compromise on duration for shopping. I want to be there for a finite duration of time. She for an infinite duration. What is a compromise of infinity and finiteness? THERE IS NONE. FINITENESS CAN BE A SUBSET OF THE INFINITE BUT INFINITY CANNOT BE A SUBSET OF THE FINITE and is thus UNCOMPROMISABLE. Thus, I as one of the finite preference must yield to the infinite in the mathematical reality of duration, and wait with patience and understanding until she has used up a finite duration within her apparent infinite duration of shopping.

Who Am I?
After being treated with much appreciation for about a week each with two daughters' families, I searched for some kind of appropriate self-image, so special it was to be among them both individually and as a group at times. A designation that came to me was that of “Respected Patriarch”. I was more than just one of them, sometimes withdrawing and resting and sometimes just among them as they engaged in animated family talk. Sometimes when I spoke, they listened with real interest what I might have to say as a matter of wisdom. When we prayed the next morning in coming home, it was with great love and intercession as we remembered the second generation who are making so many decisions of life- vocation, education, partners, and commitment to Kingdom life and service. I am committed to give to them all I can as the elder they look to for inspiration and example.



 At Aldi's store this morning it seemed that most of the women shopping were so very big. I just felt it would be a bit dangerous to be married to one of them as they could easily throw you out if they got vexed at you. Or such a wife could pushed you out of bed effortlessly, whether inadvertently or advertently. I should be grateful for the gift of smallness in the one with whom I share life.

 But Seriously,
Like the confetti falling from the windows of a high rise apartment along a street in a parade so that everyone is experiencing the expression of love from above; and sometimes something so definitely falls on a marcher that he feels he must be the target of a personal confetti thrower, so it is at times when our eyes are open to the innumerable bright spots in our lives where God blesses us with showers of his love and sometimes it is so personal that it seems he had his eyes on us precisely when the blessing falls on us and we are especially awed by all the blessings that also fall like rain all around us.  [This is in the context of our retirement setting where we are blessed with family, friends, finances, and a beautiful home on a large lot of trees and gardens and lawns where we can relax indoors and enjoy the outdoors endlessly.]

June and July Blogs

June 10

My First Glimpses of Heaven

June 12

Me and Daudy from “My Life story”

June 15

Seventy Things For Which Life is Too Short”

July 8

Healing Love

Love Is...

July 10

Chuck Stoner Visits Nicaragua video

July 14

What is My Worst Sin?

Me and Brother Norman

Comments welcome at lornoah@comcast.net

                                               ME AND BROTHER NORMAN

Brother Norman was my teacher at Clinton Christian Day School the first three years of its existence and my last three years of school. It was his first teaching job. I remember how he stood before us on that first day and told us with a little nervousness that he was a new teacher. He was friendly, down to earth, and a serious Christian which showed every day. Friendly yes, but not a buddy. He was the teacher, and his friendly dignity never broke down.

He told us only a little of his family, being one of 15 children in Montana, far out West. He was married to a local young woman. But I new little more. I knew that he became a deacon at some time. He was a Mennonite and I was Amish, so we met little outside of school functions.

I remember how he could prod students to study. He was consistent in a memory program of Scripture. Every Monday he would assign a group of verses. These we practiced during the week and by Friday we wrote them. There would be anything from 5 to 14 verses. We memorize the book of I John and the 4 chapters of Romans- 5-8. The longest stretch for a week was John 1:1-14. Then there were many other individual verses. Did we memorize the Sermon on the Mount? I don’t know, but it has always been very familiar. It did not seem laborious for me.

Brother Norman had a way of saying something that would always stick with me. Some were sayings like, “Wait (weight) is what broke the wagon down”, (possibly as an antidote to causing delay) which I repeated to my children for years before they fully comprehended it. He always said that there are always two alternatives to every problem, something I recalled many times when my family thought there was not even one way out of a dilemma. He even claimed that he can prove that a hill was a lazy dog: “a slow [p] up.”

He had other ways to make a point. One time when I had trouble getting to class after recess, he had me and another student with the same problem write an essay on “Choice, Not Chance, Determines Human Destiny” I don’t know whether the other student took that seriously, but I did and wrote up a page of my thesis. He had a reason for making me do it.

One time, perhaps soon after the above essay, I’m not sure, he summoned me into the office and asked me point blank, “Are you a Christian?” I was probably about 15 at the time. It didn’t help to say that I hope so, or wanted to be. He wanted to know if I WAS then; or to make me think on that issue. I don’t remember how that conversation turned out but I never forgot the question. He had that kind of concern and when I responded then at Brunk Brother Revival invitation, about that time, I knew the salvation Scriptures a little better than the person ascribed to help me reach a conclusion. Brother Norman was really concerned about important matters.

So he was also concerned about self-control. When I discovered a girl sitting near me in the class room who was willing to listen to me anytime I said something, he noticed that. He had us stay in one recess and allowed us to talk all we wanted to, which wasn’t nearly as much fun as in school time. I suppose his watchful eye spoiled everything!

Brother Norman really fostered a love of music in many of us. He led in chorus practice and in many school programs. He noticed my bass harmony singing and once asked several of us to sing a song for the group to help them hear what it should sound like. We sang many kinds of music, of course all religious. He made choir singing enjoyable for all.

I always admired Brother Norman for his persistent tutelage and concern for me both in my education and Spiritual development. His character was so consistently Christian and his dedication to teaching so clear. It was then a bit of a disappointment that when I left school, I also lost familiar contact with him. When we would see each other at school functions, I admired him more than he considered me a special person. He was special to me. Perhaps I was a problem to him some times, or he couldn’t be close to all his students. But to me he was a noble mentor, one of the most significant teachers I had in my first nine years. I will always remember Brother Norman as one who went before me when I needed a model for my life.

                                             What is My Worst Sin?

(Or What is God’s Desire for Christians Living in an Affluent Culture in a World of Desperate Needs?)                                                     

                                                         

Many people have their favorite sin to hate. When I was young the most unforgivable sin was murder. We didn't expect to see anyone in heaven who had killed someone. Later it was adultery that was hardly remediable. Today for some it is harming the environment. Probably child abuse is near the top, or is it the bottom of worst sins followed closely by domestic abuse, especially men against women.  For evangelicals, homosexuality ranks high. For the liberal it is capital punishment and war. For the conservative it is big government and doubt of the literal truth of the Bible. The Singer Keith Green emphasized that judgment will be based on “what they did and didn’t do” with reference to the poor and unjust victims of society. For some in Belize, where we lived for years, about the worst sin was to get angry; immorality was understandable to them, but anger called into question one’s Christianity.

With that prologue, I suppose I have no right to claim any favorite sin to hate of my own. Perhaps we can safely say that all of the above sins are serious enough to warrant our attention. Perhaps on the positive side, it is good that at least someone is drawing attention to the serious faults of mankind. On the negative, it is a serious fault to regard any sin as worthy of our total focus so other sins can then be lived with more comfortably. It is true that Biblical teachers such as Paul and Jesus had a whole list of sins that they did not seem to list in order of seriousness. Anger is listed there with immorality, but so also is greed; and covetousness is in the Ten Commandments along with murder. But anger and greed and covetousness can be rationalized away easier than murder and so seem more “gray”. So we have many other gray sins that we can reason away so as to accommodate to our culture, religious and personal values and be at peace with these sins we hate less.

I suppose my favorite sin to hate is the way Christians can do just that- interpret Scripture in a way so that they can justify largely what they want. This goes across the board, from selfishness to greed, materialism, and militarism. Many Christian will also steer from sexual sins but totally ignoring Jesus’ words about “loving the [global] neighbor as one’s self,” permitting them to live on an economic level 50 or a hundred time that of starving millions.  They rightly hate abortion, but ignore the thousands of already born persons dying each day of hunger and lack of simple medicines. They believe in evangelism but hoard wealth in the form of mansions, vehicles, and security- rather than to carry the Gospel to the ends of the earth. They support the causes of God with a token stewardship of the tithe and perhaps a bit more and then spend the rest on comforts and cultural ideals. Yes, this is my favorite sin to hate, but I believe it agrees with God’s word and his Heart as He reveals it by the life and teachings of Jesus. The Western church needs a cultural revolution where it once more  responds to the words of Paul, not to let the “world” wrap it self around [it], but to be transformed by a new mind which follows Christ instead; where we are dead to sins of cultural conformity. Our usual favorite sins to hate are easier and more comfortable to avoid, but the “gray” ones call for a radical transformation of our style of life. Being “dead to sin” also means to be unresponsive to the affluency sins that the church and polite society accept as well as what is rightly rejected.  Again, our economic standard of living should not be determined primarily by a "Christian" culture or a compromising church, but by Christ and the will of God for all of us as responsible stewards of wealth. What would God really want to do in the wide world through the resources he has given to his people? [Again, Keith Green said, “It is not God’s fault that the lost are not being reached.”] Hasn’t God given the church the economic resources to carry the Gospel to a lost and impoverished world, which the present church is using too much on itself, all of us Christians doing our part in this?