At Our House

I wonder if it ethical to do things behind a spouse's back. Perhaps even deceiving her in order to “keep peace in the family”, as a friend used to say. If I feel she does too much impulse buying at the grocery store, and so I buy what I know we need when I am on the road or when she is at work so she has less reason the go to the store. I certainly would not tell her about my motives for being so thoughtful. How about outright trickery? She thinks Folgers coffee is better than cheaper generic. I don't think she can tell the difference, especially since she drinks so little coffee. So I buy generic without telling her and keep filling the Folgers container with that generic coffee while she is sleeping. She hasn't noticed it yet. I am not lying, am I? Why stir up an argument with a confession?

                                                                                                                             

She spends so much out back pulling the weeds she just hates, ”weed of the month”, it seems. Then she is so tired even the next morning. I suggested she may be compulsive or getting old or worse. I miss her too when I am in the house. I go out and help her some but I can't stand it long with my knee weakness. But if I am in the house several hours and she is out there, I get a bit lonely or have feelings of guilt that I am relaxing and she is working. Of course I don't feel as strong about those weeds that they have to be pulled way back in the locust forest, but she really wants to do that and doesn't complain about me not helping more as she knows my knees are weak. Kind of a dilemma. 

In our present days living here in Elkhart as retired persons, we are amazed at God's planning ahead for us for these days. We could never have planned or predicted matters for our life now as we experience it. I think of three items on this.

         When we bought this place 42 years ago, we had no idea that we would retire here. What is amazing is that God gave us this large lot, which we used in earlier years for our family, but which only now do we grasp how gracious he was in giving us all this land to enjoy. Taking care of it is like living in the Garden of Eden, where so many things can grow and be beautiful. We have something to do, not as work, but as recreation and for physical, mental, and Spiritual benefits. It is cause for worship as we cultivate it and plant things here and there, like fruit and flowering trees and gardens. We appreciate it far more consciously than ever before. It seems God for-saw that this would be just the place for us in these latter years.

        The other matter is our finances. We rather innocently bought our first rental property when we knew nothing about rentals nor had any money for investment. Then we bought more rentals when we had insurance money and later as a small house with fire damage which we fixed up. In the last year another property practically fell into our hands when we certainly didn't have the money. Now we are well taken care of financially by God's plan and direction so that we have much less to worry about than many older persons.

         The third matter is when our house burned in the 70's, certainly when we could least afford to build a new house. We rebuilt it as well as we could, using much of our own labor as well as significant insurance money. But here now 35 years later, we relax in it and it feels so comfortable and adequate for our needs and contentment. Sure, we can imagine building a garage or family room to it, but it is large enough and cozy enough to be very comfortable in it. It is amazing how God provided the setting for us to rebuild it for our present comfort and enjoyment. House fires are a tragedy at the time, but it enabled us to build what is now so appropriate and comfortable in our latter years. It all just makes us feel so grateful the way God planned things for us way back when we could not have predicted these days for us.