My Youth Years
16-20
[Biographical]
During
the years of my "youth", we hardly thought of the Spiritual
movement that was going on as something special. Yet that movement
affected so much of what we did as youth and affected the way many of
our lives turned out. When I say "we" I am thinking of the
way I was in the middle of a youth group as well as a church, and the
wider Amish church where we all were moved on from our Amish ways and
thinking. There was an emphasis on personal salvation, Bible study,
a concern for missions; and for youth, personal holy living. Higher
education was idealized. These convictions affected us greatly and
led many of us into activities of service that were new and unknown
in the Amish church, although by now they all seem common to
Christians around us.
In
about 1947, Bible study meetings were started in our church where
Loretta, my future wife, and I attended. On Wednesday evenings a
group of about 30-40 persons, young to old, met. The children had
children's classes. A lay person lead in discussion of a Scripture.
Finally a minister spoke on a designated topic. It was a time of
eager learning for all of us and a time where people could express
their understandings and ask questions about Scripture. It was a time
for all, especially adults to be open to what ever the Spirit was
leading us into. We could compare what we were learning to where we
came from as Amish persons. The Scriptures became our pattern and
thinking rather just what the preachers told us.
When
I turned 16, there was already a youth group concerned to live
devotedly as Christians. Assurance of Salvation was assumed, new for
those of Amish faith. We youth were inspired by several older single
ladies, in their 20's, to do many things not typical for Amish youth.
We had real worship singing fellowships most Sunday evenings. A
committee kept things organized a little. Someone always led in a
short devotional. We sang gospel song and gradually moved more into
hymns. That this was revolutionary can be seen compared to the
typical Amish "singings" where youth gathered not to
worship, although there was some singing going on. Instead, they were
mostly outside in the dark, carousing, smoking, drinking, or just
standing around if they were not into wildness. Sometimes we were at
such singings as they were called. But we were inside the house and
orderly. Some called us "Chuck Wagon" after a gospel
country group, as we sang 4 part harmony. Sometimes we were mocked
by some as being goody-goodies or Elamites, after my father who was a
minister and supportive of what we were doing. Often when we went
home, on the way out, some would say something about us, teasing or
mocking and we might get into conversations and disputes with those
not of our group. Usually I was too young and shy to get into such
conversations but the older youth would have quite some arguments.
One time when the youth singing was at our place, dozens of buggies
of the “wild” Amish youth came and there was a lot of commotion
outside. I suppose we picked up beer bottles the next day, I don't
remember. I just know there was a lot of excitement and confusion .
We felt like we were invaded. Some times the police came and arrested
some for under age drinking.
When
I was 15 or 16, there were revival meeting going on near Goshen.
These had the emphasis of personal salvation and dedication of lives,
or Spiritual renewal. These were the Brunk Revivals, led by two
brothers from Virginia. They had a tent set up that could accommodate
6,000 persons and sometimes it was overflowing. Our family went there
numerous times with our neighbor as we had no car. He had a 1951
Studebaker, I believe, and we enjoyed his hospitality of
transportation. I believe I counted 17 times that I went along.
The
meeting lasted about 6 weeks, every evening, (Except Monday nights??)
It was at one of these meetings that I went forward and stood with
many other by the raised platform and made my commitment to Christ.
Then we went to the back of the tent and had a personal worker help
us further as we needed it. I recall knowing Scriptures about as well
as he as I had been to that Christian school where we memorized so
much . It was meaningful to me and to many others and a part of our
clarification of salvation and assurance of salvation. Likely this
revival was a part of the fuller understanding of salvation for many,
and the conviction that this was a commitment of full surrender to
God in every aspect of life.
Either
before or after the Brunk Brother Revivals, I don't remember just
when, I struggled to maintain my relationship with God. As long as I
read the Bible daily and prayed, things were ok. But if I would lapse
in my devotions, I would wonder about my relation with God. Then I
would have to re-commit myself to God again to be sure I was all
right with God. When I turned 18, I remember that I affirmed strongly
to God that I will serve him even if I have my failings. I then had
less difficulty with assurance of my salvation.
When
I was about 16, I had a friend in the Amish church who was planning
to join the Conservative Mennonite Church. I had planned to join with
him at the church just a few miles down the road. When Dad learned of
that, he strongly urged me not to. “Wasn't the church of my parents
good enough for me?” he asked. I gave in and feel it was likely
just as good but many things in my life would have been different,
probably not better. I also did not like to promise what I was asked
to at baptism: that I would always stay with the Amish church. Dad
assured me that that question should be a commitment to be faithful
to the Church of Christ, not the denomination. So figuratively, I
crossed my fingers when that question was asked. Oddly, the visiting
bishop who baptized us, forgot to have us kneel for baptism and so we
had to do the questions again “on bended knees” and then be
baptized. Loretta was baptized at another church the same day, 9
miles away.
At
the same time. there was a mission movement going on in our part of
the Amish church. There were a number of mission conferences held, at
least three, that I attended in our area or close. The convictions
were growing strong that to be a Christian meant to be a witness for
Christ. And not just locally but abroad from Indiana. So Hillcrest
Home for the aged was started in Arkansas where many youth were
exposed to a life of service "out there". Then a mission
school was started in Red lake, Ontario, (That deserves a chapter in
in itself of our experience there.) Locally also, our church had
services at rescue meetings in Elkhart and South Bend.
The
youth had "youth project" for some years. We would gather
at a church member's house and raise some crop for some mission
project. I remember once going house to house in North Goshen
distributing cabbage or something. Once we had several acres of
popcorn. It was a good time to socialize as well. One year we raised
lima beans and shelled them. It was easy to work along side our
favorite girl friends and thus often I would just "accidentally"
be working beside Loretta. Some may have noticed that habit, but no
one made an issue of it. Of course she had no other way to go to
project so I always had to pick her up and take her home. But usually
a sister was along. Just a bonus of fellowship among the youth.
I
mentioned that we were known for our singing. With our mission
interest, we would go to sing at homes for the aged, like Froh
Brothers in Michigan and in also in Goshen. Somehow,
we
also got into churches for programs. As we went past Marion Mennonite
church on Route120 the other day, I recalled we once gave a program
there. I remember that my future brother-in-law said that was the
first time he had lead an audible prayer in a group. There were many
firsts for us. We also sang in a Brethren church probably past
Syracuse. Once, just for the experience, we visited a black church
in Elkhart and of course were intrigued by their different music and
amens in the preaching. Some years later we were revisited in our
church by a black group and I remember how strange it should have
been to have such a foot-stumping group in a "plain"
church. I can't remember who invited them. Few if any complained. It
wasn't always known who the initiators were of different activities.
Someone would lead and others would follow in the many things that
happened, although as I mentioned, often a committee consulted in
matters or the whole group made decisions. But the single people were
usually autonomous with no adult sponsorship.
Along
with the Spiritual emphases there was less clinging to the old and
traditional ways of the Amish. In the mid fifties the churches, that
is, three adjacent Amish churches, began to allow electricity. Soon
after, people were beginning to get cars, and the ministers decided
they would allow that- with the consent of the congregation. I
remember driving a buggy to church when there were also cars there. I
never had my own car as a teen; in fact I first got license to drive when
I was 19, about the time my father bought the first car for the
family. Mom was not to excited about that change. She remarked once,
"Yes, you claim you can get there more quickly with a car."
Yet our dress code changed little from the Amish style. Well,
Loretta did wear a dress with a stand-up collar which was pushing a
bit beyond tradition!
Of
course the church wasn't the only thing in my life. When I was 17,
our family went on a western trip by train. Two sisters, two
brothers, and our parents and I traveled. We went to Colorado where
we visited some youth who were in alternative service, alternative to
the military, which was compulsive at that time for everyone. Then we
went north visiting Hutterites in Montana and on west to the coast
where my father had cousins in Oregon. There we learned by letter that
our barn back home had burn down, struck by lightning. Then we went
down to Sacramento where Dad also had a cousin working at a street
rescue mission. I remember this cousin telling my dad that when you
walk on those streets, you had better keep walking steadily to avoid
danger of people there. Later in Southern California we saw some
sequoia trees, huge they were, and over to the Grand Canyon. Coming
back we visited friends in Kansas. The youth usually had a social for
visitors which didn't happen often. One fellow asked me if I had a
girl friend back home, and if I thought of her every day. Perhaps it
was for the next thing he asked me that. As was their custom, they all had
partners for the social and they wanted to set me up with a nice
girl, Emma Miller. We knew that family some. We had met two from
that family among the VS workers in Colorado earlier on that trip.
[[Loretta says I sent her only one post card on that trip and my
cousin said I should have sent more.] I could recall many more
incidents on that trip, like when we were at the Garden of the Gods in
Colorado, my little brother asked "Where are the gods.?"
The last stop was at Hillcrest Home in Arkansas where my brother
Daniel was serving in those years. Interestingly, for the style of
our family, we traveled mostly at night, sleeping on the train, saving us hotel costs. We
always had a box of food with us or was it a suitcase? Dad said he
would buy three dollars of food which would last about three days,
but Joseph once said he got so tired of mushroom soup! I do remember
once we rented a house overnight somewhere.. I believe we made our
trip bit shorter because of the barn burning, but we still traveled
about a month.
The
other thing in those days was that when we started rebuilding the
barn, Dad suggested I start working away. Money was probably more
helpful than my carpentry. So I worked in a poultry dressing plant
for about 5 months at $1.20 an hour. My arms ached from pulling
chickens out of the crates day after day and would be numb in the
mornings. When I went to a doctor about that, he suggested that he
knew my family well enough to think I could be doing something
a bit more challenging- that my arms were rebelling at the thought of
going to work each day. I changed job eventually and worked at Pine
Manor, handling dressed turkeys. After about a month I took my first
trailer factory job. I guess they expected me to be fully trained and
after 2 weeks they let me go without any reason given. I felt they didn't
give me enough help to learn the job. I went to another factory and
did well, getting raises every few weeks until I had climbed from
$1.30 to 1.60 per hour 5 cents at a time, or once 10 cents which was
excellent. But being laid off in their slack season, I went to Buddy
Mobile Homes in Elkhart. I rode with a young man who went 80-90 mph
on Route 20 every day. It seems I was laid off there and went back to
Smokers in New Paris, and later back to Buddy's as I closed out my
teen years. This experience gave me some skills which were helpful to
me in further labor later on as well in getting a job. Getting a job
was easy in those days. I gave my Dad all my money from my jobs which
he kept track of and allowed 10% which he saved up for me. I had $450
when I got married.
I
suppose any young reader would be interested to hear a bit more about
dating in “them days,” at least how I learned to know Loretta.
Once when our Bible study was just about half mile for her place I
walked her home. I don't remember if I even asked her, or just walked
with her and her brother. I have no idea what we talked about,
probably not much anyway, shy as I have said we were. Around that
time I asked her if we could talk somewhere a bit after Bible study
until our parent were ready to go home. She said she suspected her
parents would say she was too young. After all, she was no more than
15, if even that old. I used to have those early encounters in my
head but no more. I mentioned that we were often together at youth
project. The same was also true of going to the youth singing on
Sunday evenings, Soon, however, I was with her alone. What passed off
as necessary for her getting around became a matter of choice.
Actually, we rarely went anywhere away by ourselves,. The routine was
just that after a Sunday evening singing, I would take her home and
we talked at her house in the living room after most of her family
had gone to bed. Often we ate ice cream in the kitchen before heading
for the living room.
Courting
and dating by buggy did have its unique situations and opportunities.
One Sunday evening when we were meeting about 4 miles from her home,
I allowed the horse to walk all the way to her home. You can imagine
how a full moon might have enhanced those kinds of experiences,
although I doubt that we knew that it should or could. We would talk
and talk, at least I would talk and she mostly would listen. I am
still a blabber until she might get tired of it, but then she thought
I was a intelligent and she happily listened, I guess. True, after I
quit school, I read a lot, especially the Reader's Digest and books
on science, especially astronomy.
Of course in the winter we did not
waste too much time in those unheated buggies. We always had a heavy
blanket to keep from getting too cold. They joked about some fellows
having an "Armstrong Heater" which was riding with your arm
around the girl. Sometimes we would ride with another couple, 4
people, where there was only seating for two, each fellow with a girl
on his lap, or girls holding each other if there were three girls. We
did not think that objectionable although knowing that we always
needed to be respectful of each other.
Once
we were at my cousin's place, Loretta and I and two other girls and
their boy friends. An older single person, Sadie, was also there and
she just noted how young we all were. "Well, you girls are just
school girls," she exclaimed. It seemed that Loretta had more
privileges then the other girls, her close friends, who were about the same
age. The girls use to persuade their mothers for going places, "Well,
Rosa or Fanny Ellen can go". Of course our parents knew where we
were and trusted us and were fairly lenient with the girls even
before they were 16 which was the official Amish age of being with the
young folks. My mother used to say that they always wanted to know
where we are going, but if we went to a second place, they don't have
to know. Of course that was ages before cell phones.
With
our early associations it is no wonder that we thought of marriage
early. I had in mind to go to college but knew I could not go before
I was 21: "of age". And I wanted to go to Red Lake to serve
my two years. I did not want to go without her, knowing I would not
likely see her for a year or two. And we were also well bonded- "in
love" before then. So I proposed to her when I was 19 and she
two years younger. I like to say that when I wanted to tell her
father that we want to get married, he fell asleep without
responding. But then he often fell asleep soon after he sat down
after supper. Actually I don't know if I had to ask him in our
setting, although at that age, it seems I should have. They never did
object, but it seems to me that they gently steered us to wait about
6 months longer than I wanted. I suppose Loretta was happy to wait a
bit longer. That year Loretta attended 6 weeks of Bible School at
Berlin Ohio, which later became Rosedale Bible School. While she was
there I visited her one weekend and we went ice skating, something I
likely had never done before. Also I went to Red Lake twice to help
build the Indian school where we went later for service.
All
this was happening in my middle to late teens. It was a most eventful
time of change, maturation in faith and relationships. It did not
seem nearly as momentous then as it does now, looking back from this
stance. God was moving in many ways and places. The dynamic changes
taking place in our thinking and commitment was also taking place in
other Amish communities. It now seems that the foundation was being
laid for many of us from our church who would go out into many places
and types of service. We never felt we were doing anything special.
We were only following Christ, hopefully, in all of our lives,
knowing yet that we were immature and making mistakes as we were
learning to live for Christ and his Kingdom, carrying out God's
mission for us. Hopefully growing up in our youth years.